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One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.13

One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages. v. 13
Enhancement in scientific research and technology has resulted in advanced medical facilities. On account of this, the lifespan of individuals has also increased. Is this improvement an advantage or a disadvantage? This essay will attempt to objectively examine all significant components in detail. Objectivity being of the essence, the following words will weigh one side of the issue against the other. In my opinion, higher life expectancy is an asset to mankind. On the other hand, there are several negative factors associated with the same. The following two paragraphs will delve effectively into both aspects. First, by living a longer life people can try different careers and grow economically as well. Second, the older generation will have loads of information and experience to share with the youth. To substantiate the above, my friend’s grandfather is in his 90’s and we learnt a lot of ancient healing methods from him when we fall sick, not only that he has also helped us keep the culture of that time. However, there are two sides of a coin. Higher lifespan will contribute to the growing population of the world. Next, the longer a person lives he or she might become undesired for their family and be sent to an old-age home. To corroborate what has just been stated, my cousin has sent their aged parents to a senior-aged home, as they are not like minded. In light of the above, positives like availing options in careers and gaining monetarily are evident. Contrarily, the increasing population of the planet commands equal consideration. Bringing this essay to a close, there are at least two sides to any situation. In this instance, benefits prevail on either side.
Enhancement in scientific research and technology has resulted in advanced medical facilities. On account of this, the lifespan of individuals has
also
increased. Is this improvement an advantage or a disadvantage? This essay will attempt to
objectively
examine all significant components in detail.

Objectivity being of the essence, the following words will weigh one side of the issue against the other. In my opinion, higher life expectancy is an asset to mankind.
On the other hand
, there are several
negative
factors associated with the same. The following two paragraphs will delve
effectively
into both aspects.

First
, by living a longer life
people
can try
different
careers and grow
economically
as well
. Second, the older generation will have loads of information and experience to share with the youth. To substantiate the above, my friend’s grandfather is in his 90’
s and
we
learnt
a lot of
ancient healing methods from him when we fall sick, not
only
that he has
also
helped
us
keep
the culture of that time.

However
, there are two
sides
of a coin. Higher lifespan will contribute to the growing population of the world.
Next
, the longer a person
lives
he or she might become undesired for their family and be
sent
to an
old
-age home. To corroborate what has
just
been stated
, my cousin has
sent
their aged parents to a senior-aged home, as they are not
like minded
.

In light of the above, positives like availing options in careers and gaining
monetarily
are evident.
Contrarily
, the increasing population of the planet commands equal consideration.

Bringing this essay to a close, there are at least two
sides
to any situation. In this instance, benefits prevail on either side.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages. v. 13

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
281 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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