Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Nowadays, we can watch entertainment performances from the screen (laptop etc) and no need to watch it live. To what extent do you agree? v.1

Nowadays, we can watch entertainment performances from the screen (laptop etc) and no need to watch it live. v. 1
These days, technology has changed our lives in the past years. The favourite shows are just one click away in the modern world. Some people believe that we do not need to go to a theatre to watch a live show when you have T. V screens and laptops. I totally agree with that and in this essay I will support my opinion with examples. Firstly, the modern technology focuses on human’s comfort. People can have access to the number of channels on the flat screen. One can watch any program according to his will. For Example, there are about 80-100 channels listed to cable operators by the PEMRA in Pakistan. The person can watch and change anytime the channel depending on his mood. Another reason why I support this argument is that the laptops are just another level of ease. There are a variety of fun programs available from the different countries of the World. There are some online shows. On the other hand some people think that these electronics just devalued the artists. In the past times, artists rehearsed a several times before going on stage. But nowadays, stars just come to the set and took 2 to 3 takes and go home In conclusion, although it is a common belief that there are no programs of this time can match with live shows. I believe that having options are always a good idea. Personally, I think that it is more convenient to watch a play in a relaxing environment rather to watch theatres.
These days, technology has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in the past years. The
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
one click away in the modern world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that we do not need to go to a
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
when you have T. V screens and laptops. I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with that and in this essay I will support my opinion with examples.

Firstly
, the modern technology focuses on human’s comfort.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
can have access to the number of channels on the flat screen. One can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
any program according to his will.
For Example
, there are about 80-100 channels listed to cable operators by the
Possible spelling mistake found.
PEMRA
in Pakistan. The person can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
anytime the channel depending on his mood.

Another reason why I support this argument is that the laptops are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
another level of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
. There are a variety of fun programs available from the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries of the World. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
online
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
.

On the other hand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that these electronics
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
devalued the artists. In the past times, artists rehearsed a several times
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
going on stage.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
nowadays, stars
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to the set and took 2 to 3 takes and go home

In conclusion
, although it is a common belief that there are no programs of this time can match with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
. I believe that having options are always a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.
Personally
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is more convenient to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
a play in a relaxing environment
rather
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatres' is British English.
theatres
.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays, we can watch entertainment performances from the screen (laptop etc) and no need to watch it live. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
256 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts