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Nowadays, there is a trend that reports of media focus on problems and emergencies rather than positive development. Some people think it is harmful to individuals and to society. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.4

Nowadays, there is a trend that reports of media focus on problems and emergencies rather than positive development. Some people think it is harmful to individuals and to society. v. 4
In recent decades, the press and news channels have had the habit of prioritising bad news over positive developments. Although this trend is the inherent nature of the media, its adverse effects on individuals and society deserve consideration. There are a number of reasons why the media are so eager to jump on ill news. First, since the public has an affinity for problems or emergencies articles; it is thus the best way for reporters to attract a myriad of readers. In fact, humans are biologically hardwired to react more intensely to dangers or bad news, which induces them to seek for these hot scoops in newspapers. Second, reporting negative information is actually more straightforward than positive developments, which allows the media to feed their audiences a constant stream of news. For example, conducting an article or a broadcast on a traffic accident requires less effort as well as specialised knowledge than reporting a scientific breakthrough. Nevertheless, the rampancy of bad news in the media is detrimental to the public as a whole. First, from an individual perspective, if the press draws up a daunting reality with through its pages and broadcast, people will be discouraged to leave their comfort zone. For example, more and more parents are opting for home schooling in fear of their children being abused in public institutions, deriving the chance of interpersonal interactions of their offspring. Second, from a societal perspective, by allowing the availability of negative stories, the media are to blame for the escalating distrust between people. In fact, ill news causes people to be sceptical of each other, which hinders their social bonds. In conclusion, although the press and news channels are entitled to deliver problems and emergencies stories, this trend proves detrimental to individuals and society as a whole. The media should revise with care which piece of news is worth reporting.
In recent decades, the press and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
channels have had the habit of
Possible spelling mistake. 'prioritising' is British English.
prioritising
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
over
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
developments. Although this trend is the inherent nature of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
, its adverse effects on individuals and society deserve consideration.

There are a number of reasons why the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
eager to jump on ill
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
.
First
, since the public has an affinity for problems or emergencies articles; it is
thus
the best way for reporters to attract a myriad of readers. In fact, humans are
biologically
hardwired to react more
intensely
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
dangers
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
, which induces them to seek for these hot scoops in newspapers. Second, reporting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
information is actually more straightforward than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
developments, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
to feed their audiences a constant stream of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
.
For example
, conducting an article or a broadcast on a traffic accident requires less effort
as well
as
Possible spelling mistake. 'specialised' is British English.
specialised
knowledge than reporting a scientific breakthrough.

Nevertheless
, the rampancy of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is detrimental to the public as a whole.
First
, from an individual perspective, if the press draws up a daunting reality with through its pages and broadcast,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will
be discouraged
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
their comfort zone.
For example
, more and more parents are opting for
This word is normally spelled as one.
home schooling
in fear of their children
being abused
in public institutions, deriving the chance of interpersonal interactions of their offspring. Second, from a societal perspective, by allowing the availability of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
stories, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
are to blame for the escalating distrust between
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. In fact, ill
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
causes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to be
Possible spelling mistake. 'sceptical' is British English.
sceptical
of each other, which hinders their social bonds.

In conclusion
, although the press and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
channels
are entitled
to deliver problems and emergencies stories, this trend proves detrimental to individuals and society as a whole. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
should revise with care which piece of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
is worth reporting.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays, there is a trend that reports of media focus on problems and emergencies rather than positive development. Some people think it is harmful to individuals and to society. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
311 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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