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Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development? v.32

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development? v. 32
IN THE MODERN ERA, WE HAVE LOTS OF OPTION TO COMMUNICATE AND MAKE NEW FRIENDS BECAUSE OF THE ADVANCED TECHNOLOGY. BUT, THIS HAS CHANGED OUR VIEWS OF MAKING TRUE FRIENDSHIP WHICH WAS BETTER WITHOUT IT. I THINK, THERE ARE SOME NEGATIVE AND POSITIVE OF THIS NEW INVENTION. FIRST OF ALL, NOWADAYS, WE ARE LESS LIKELY TO MAKE TRUE FRIENDS. IN OTHER WORDS, NEW TYPE OF APS ON MOBILE PHONES OR COMPUTERS SUCH AS WHATSAPP, SKYPE, FACEBOOK AND SO MANY OTHERS, HELP US TO MAKE NEW FRIENDS AND INTERACT WITH THEM IN A EASY WAY WITHOUT MOVING FROM ONE PLACE TO ANOTHER. HOWEVER, THESE TYPE OF FRIENDSHIP DOES NOT REMAIN FOR A LONG TIME, THEY CAN BE BROKEN IN A SECOND. WHILE, WHEN WE MAKE FRIENDS AT SCHOOL, NEIHBOURHOOD OR ANY OTHER PLACE WHERE WE COMMUNICATE FACE TO FACE, THIS WAY OF MAKING FRIENDS LAST AT THE END OF OUR LIVES. SO, TECHNOLOGY AFFECTED ON CREATING MORE FALSE RELATIONSHIPS RATHER THAN TRUE OR STRONG. MEANWHILE, THIS ALTERNATION HAS SOME NEGATIVE EFFECTS. BY MAKING FRIENDS ONLINE WE CAN INTERACT WITH SOME CRIMINAL PS OR FRAUDS WITH WHOM WE COULD MAKE A STRONG RELATION. TO BE CLEAR, IF WE TALK WITH THESE TYPE OF PEOPLE AND TELL THEM ABOUT OUR SOCIAL LIFE, IT COULD BECOME DANGER FOR US AND FOR OUR FAMILY MEMBERS. ON THE CONTRARY, THERE IS ALSO POSITIVE SIDE OF THIS, WE CAN FIND OUR FUTURE PARTNER IN THIS WAY, BUT THIS HAPPENS OCCASIONALLY. TO SUMMARIZE, I WOULD SAY THAT, WHETHER THE TECHNOLOGY MADE EASIER FOR COMMUNICATING WITH OTHERS BUT, WE FIND LESS TRUE FRIENDS THAN WE USED TO DO. FUTHERMORE, THIS IS VERY HARMFULL, IF BY CHANCE WE GET IN TOUCH WITH ANY CRIMINAL OR FRAUD.
IN THE MODERN ERA, WE HAVE LOTS OF OPTION TO COMMUNICATE AND
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
MAKE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
NEW
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FRIENDS
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BECAUSE
OF THE ADVANCED TECHNOLOGY.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BUT
, THIS HAS
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
CHANGED
OUR VIEWS OF MAKING
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
TRUE
FRIENDSHIP WHICH WAS BETTER WITHOUT IT. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
THINK
, THERE ARE
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SOME
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
NEGATIVE
AND
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
POSITIVE
OF THIS
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
NEW
INVENTION.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
FIRST OF ALL
, NOWADAYS, WE ARE LESS LIKELY TO
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
MAKE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
TRUE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FRIENDS
. IN
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
OTHER
WORDS,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
NEW
TYPE OF APS ON MOBILE PHONES OR COMPUTERS SUCH AS
Possible spelling mistake found.
WHATSAPP
, SKYPE, FACEBOOK AND
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SO
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
MANY
OTHERS,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
HELP
US TO
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
MAKE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
NEW
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FRIENDS
AND INTERACT WITH THEM IN A EASY WAY WITHOUT MOVING FROM ONE PLACE TO ANOTHER.
HOWEVER
, THESE TYPE OF FRIENDSHIP DOES NOT REMAIN FOR A LONG TIME, THEY CAN
BE BROKEN
IN A SECOND. WHILE, WHEN WE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
MAKE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FRIENDS
AT SCHOOL,
Possible spelling mistake found.
NEIHBOURHOOD
OR ANY
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
OTHER
PLACE WHERE WE COMMUNICATE FACE TO FACE, THIS WAY OF MAKING
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FRIENDS
LAST AT THE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
END
OF OUR
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
LIVES
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SO
, TECHNOLOGY
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
AFFECTED
ON CREATING MORE FALSE RELATIONSHIPS
RATHER
THAN
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
TRUE
OR STRONG.

MEANWHILE, THIS ALTERNATION HAS
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SOME
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
NEGATIVE
EFFECTS. BY MAKING
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FRIENDS
ONLINE WE CAN INTERACT WITH
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SOME
CRIMINAL PS OR FRAUDS WITH WHOM WE COULD
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
MAKE
A STRONG RELATION. TO BE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
CLEAR
, IF WE TALK WITH THESE TYPE OF
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
PEOPLE
AND
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
TELL
THEM ABOUT OUR SOCIAL LIFE, IT COULD BECOME
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
DANGER
FOR US AND FOR OUR FAMILY MEMBERS.
ON THE CONTRARY
, THERE IS
ALSO
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
POSITIVE
SIDE OF THIS, WE CAN FIND OUR FUTURE PARTNER IN THIS WAY,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BUT
THIS HAPPENS
OCCASIONALLY
.

TO SUMMARIZE
, I WOULD SAY THAT, WHETHER THE TECHNOLOGY MADE EASIER FOR COMMUNICATING WITH OTHERS
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BUT
, WE FIND LESS
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
TRUE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FRIENDS
THAN WE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
USED
TO DO.
Possible spelling mistake found.
FUTHERMORE
, THIS IS
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
VERY
Possible spelling mistake found.
HARMFULL
, IF BY CHANCE WE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
GET
IN TOUCH WITH ANY CRIMINAL OR FRAUD.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
I love commuting between languages just like I love commuting between cultures and cities.
Elif Safak

IELTS essay Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development? v. 32

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
286 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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