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Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development? v.12

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development? v. 12
A true relationship between two people requires face to face communication and time to truly get to know each other. Regardless of what humans think, all individuals admire the feeling of being wanted even if it’s a lie. The digital world has created the sense that it is passable to be who anyone wishes to be online. However, I believe that the way people know each other online and the type of relationships they make virtually have changed and for the worse. Instead of being a true friend to the people around each other, most are being turned inward, forgetting the true definition of a friend. Human beings have feelings and they feel broken at times and do not always smile but the Internet only shows one's happy moments keeping one from fully being known. The types of friendships, people make these days are quick and short lasting. In real life friendship people see each other at one’s best and worst time and remain there for one another. This can never be compared to a social network friendship. One can only get to know someone by spending time together for the reason that the Internet cannot replace shared experience and personal communication. However, due to the Internet, people can make friends anywhere from the world which was quite impossible in the past era. Finding schools and college friends and getting in touch with them is an advantage that the Internet offers to us. However, true friendship is not possible if two people, do not spend time together, share their common interests, talks a lot and help each other both in good and bad times. Rightfully, life is meant to be lived and have many physical experiences, bonding with another person’s physical presence. Instead of being a true friend to the people around each other, they are spending time online to make friends. This is, in my opinion, is a negative aspect of the digital era. In conclusion, making friends beyond boundaries and getting in touch with childhood friends could be the advantages of the digital era, but the way we are becoming dependent on the technology and the way we are pretending to maintain our friendship online have negative consequences on our personal, moral and social aspects.
A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
true
relationship between two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
requires
face to face communication and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
truly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
. Regardless of what humans
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
, all individuals admire the feeling of
being wanted
even if it’s a lie. The digital world has created the sense that it is passable to be who anyone wishes to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
.
However
, I believe that the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
know each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
and the type of relationships they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
virtually
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
and for the worse.

Instead
of being a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
true
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
around each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
, most are
being turned
inward, forgetting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
true
definition of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
. Human beings have
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
feelings and
they feel broken at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
and do not always smile
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the Internet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
one's happy moments keeping one from
fully
being known
. The types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendships
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
these days are quick and short lasting. In real life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendship
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
at one’s best and worst
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and remain there for one another. This can never
be compared
to a social network
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendship
. One can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know someone by spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
together for the reason that the Internet cannot replace shared experience and personal communication.
However
, due to the Internet,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
anywhere from the world which was quite impossible in the past era. Finding schools and college
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
and getting in touch with them is an advantage that the Internet offers to us.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
true
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendship
is not possible if two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, do not spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
together, share their common interests, talks a lot and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
both in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
times.

Rightfully
, life
is meant
to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
and have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
physical experiences, bonding with another person’s physical presence.
Instead
of being a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
true
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
around each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
, they are spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
. This is, in my opinion, is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspect of the digital era.

In conclusion
, making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
beyond boundaries and getting in touch with childhood
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
could be the advantages of the digital era,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the way we are becoming dependent on the technology and the way we are pretending to maintain our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendship
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences on our personal, moral and social aspects.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
46Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Language is wine upon the lips. – Virginia WoolfInspirational quotes for language learners
Virginia Woolf

IELTS essay Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development? v. 12

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
377 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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