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Nowadays, some parents pressure their children to be successful. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development? v.3

Nowadays, some parents pressure their children to be successful. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development? v. 3
Parents pressure their children to be successful because of the standard's that they are living in the society. They basically want their child to be in a good position and to develop their reputation of the family as well name in the area. It is because the generation is more concern to be successful rather than to be happy for the job they are doing it. Apart from that, they are habituated to hear more and more graph increased stories by the known one in their circle. One of the main reasons for parent's force is that they would like their children to lead a high standardized lifestyle by gaining success. What I mean by this is that parents might have had difficulties during their life or lived in a poor condition. For this, they do not want their children to experience the same predicaments as they did. Another factor might be the parents' willingness to show off. All parents want to be proud of their children's achievements by telling it to others and showing how successful children they have brought up. There are some factors that kids are getting squeezed or facing, hosting in different ways, in education, sports, living nature and etc. . To overcome, all stuff the youth of the present world is showing more interest to be happy with their loved once for the rest of their life. Perhaps, they are not so much concerned about the work profile or the location of the respective work. If the person becomes a goal achiever, so the circumstances will change as per their requirements in the family and the way of living differ from daily basics. They want to be rich or to show off their status and standard of living for the world. To travel in the expensive cars or to buy a villa in a cool place and maintain a level of positive terms. Rather than finding out the reason behind their interest and lack of communicating with their ward, parents are failing to know the keen interest in other platform to be successful in the future or in carer. To fulfil the status and fantasies to have things they pressure their children to be successful, in parallel they will even focus on the market which is varying everyday depends on the generation.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
pressure their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the standard's that they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in the society. They
basically
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
their child to be in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
position and to develop their reputation of the family
as well
name in the area. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the generation is more concern to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
rather
than to be happy for the job they are doing it. Apart from that, they
are habituated
to hear more and more graph increased stories by the known one in their circle.

One of the main reasons for parent's force is that they would like their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to lead a high standardized lifestyle by gaining success. What I mean by this is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
might have had difficulties during their life or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
in a poor condition. For this, they do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to experience the same predicaments as they did. Another factor might be the parents' willingness to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
off. All
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to be proud of their children's achievements by telling it to others and showing how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
they have brought up.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
factors that kids are getting squeezed or facing, hosting in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
ways, in education, sports,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
nature
Write the name of the item after 'and' or use only "etc".
and etc
.
Two consecutive dots
.
To overcome, all stuff the youth of the present world is showing more interest to be happy with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
once for the rest of their life. Perhaps, they are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much concerned about the work profile or the location of the respective work. If the person becomes a goal achiever,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the circumstances will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
as per their requirements in the family and the way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
differ from daily basics.

They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to be rich or to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
off their status and standard of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
for the world. To travel in the expensive cars or to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a villa in a cool place and maintain a level of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
terms.
Rather
than finding out the reason behind their interest and lack of communicating with their ward,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are failing to know the keen interest in other platform to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
in the future or in carer.

To fulfil the status and fantasies to have things they pressure their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
, in parallel they will even focus on the market which is varying
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
depends on the generation.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays, some parents pressure their children to be successful. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development? v. 3

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
387 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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