Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Nowadays people make new friends through social media and internet chat groups. Some people think it is a good idea. Other think that face to face interaction is essential. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.1

Nowadays people make new friends through social media and internet chat groups. Some people think it is a good idea. Other think that face to face interaction is essential. v. 1
As school of thought believes that the most effective method to curb the increasing number of overweight in people is by introducing more physical education lessons in the school syllabus. As this problem is applying a strain on the health care system, which is trying to put down the health issues. In my opinion, I completely agree that this is a best way to tackle the issue with overweight. Firstly, dealing with the growing obesity is by adding more exercises in their physical training classes. Because exercise plays a vital role to end overweight in children and keeps them fit. For example, research conducted by the World Health Organization illustrated that 90% of fat related issues will be solved if more emphasis is put on exercising, especially at an young age. As a result, exercise helps to reduce diseases caused by overweight. Secondly, the government must insist schools to educate pupils theoretically about the consequence of being obese, by teaching them the rationale behind putting on weight. In other words, students should be aware of the problems that will incur due to the increasing weight, which ought to be taught to them theoretically. For instance, an extensive study by the University of Vermont demonstrated that theoretical way of educating children about the drawbacks of obesity will resolve 70% of these issues. Consequently, when demerits of obesity if thought in theory then students will be mindful of their fitness. In conclusion, I strongly argue that the most effective methodology to manage obesity is by adding more physical training lessons both practically and theoretically in school curriculum.
As
school
of
thought
believes that the most effective method to curb the increasing number of overweight in
people
is
by introducing more physical education lessons in the
school
syllabus. As this problem is applying a strain on the health care system, which is trying to put down the health
issues
. In my opinion, I completely
agree
that this is
a
best way to tackle the
issue
with overweight.

Firstly
, dealing with the growing obesity is by adding more exercises in their physical training classes.
Because
exercise plays a vital role to
end
overweight in children and
keeps
them fit.
For example
, research conducted by the World Health Organization illustrated that 90% of
fat
related
issues
will
be solved
if more emphasis
is put
on exercising,
especially
at
an
young age.
As a result
, exercise
helps
to
reduce
diseases caused by overweight.

Secondly
, the
government
must
insist
schools
to educate pupils
theoretically
about the consequence of being obese, by teaching them the rationale behind putting on weight.
In other words
, students should be aware of the problems that will incur due to the increasing weight, which ought to
be taught
to them
theoretically
.
For instance
, an extensive study by the University of Vermont demonstrated that theoretical way of educating children about the drawbacks of obesity will resolve 70% of these
issues
.
Consequently
, when demerits of obesity if
thought
in theory then students will be mindful of their fitness.

In conclusion
, I
strongly
argue that the most effective methodology to manage obesity is by adding more physical training lessons both
practically
and
theoretically
in
school
curriculum.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays people make new friends through social media and internet chat groups. Some people think it is a good idea. Other think that face to face interaction is essential. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts