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Nowadays more and more people have to compete with young people for the same jobs. What problems does this cause? What are some possible solutions? v.3

Nowadays more and more people have to compete with young people for the same jobs. What problems does this cause? What are some possible solutions? v. 3
In these days most job seekers have to compete with an adolescent for the same work-related jobs. This essay suggests that teenagers need to put additional efforts to compete with other people who have experience and the best solution is the government should take steps to create new employment opportunities and encourage the entrepreneur. Practiced and teenagers who came from college recently are trying for the same job, The companies prefer the candidates who have the experience to avoid the training expenses. So it's very difficult to freshers to enter into the job market. For example, In south Indian companies, If both experienced persons and freshers are trying for the same job, The companies preferred the experience holder, As they have a burden if they recruit the fresher by providing the training, So to avoid this additional cost they prefer training person. So getting jobs is difficult for freshers, it leads to the unemployment problem in the country. A solution to the problem of more people compete with young people, the Government provides the employment opportunities and provide the subsidy or encouragement schemes for the people who have plans to start their own business. Some people have a passion to be an employer instead of working with other employers. This steps from the government to resolve the issues of trying the same job by both young and other people. Recently the Indian government provides the schemes and subsidy for people who won't start the business. It reduced the unemployment problem and have been increasing the chance of getting the jobs for freshers and experience holders. In Conclusion, The chances of getting a job will be less for non-experience holders, if the same job tried both freshers and experienced persons. The best solution to encourage persons who have an interest in starting their own firm by providing schemes.
In these days most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
seekers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
compete with an adolescent for the same work-related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
. This essay suggests that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
need to put additional efforts to compete with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
and the best solution is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should take steps to create new employment opportunities and encourage the entrepreneur.

Practiced and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
came from college recently are trying for the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
prefer the candidates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
to avoid the training expenses.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult to freshers to enter into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
market.
For example
, In south Indian
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
, If both experienced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
persons
and freshers are trying for the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
preferred the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
holder, As they have a burden if they recruit the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fresher
by providing the training,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
to avoid this additional cost they prefer training
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
is difficult for freshers, it leads to the unemployment problem in the country.

A solution to the problem of more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
compete with young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
provides the employment opportunities and provide the subsidy or encouragement schemes for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have plans to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
business.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have a passion to be an employer
instead
of working with other employers. This steps from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to resolve the issues of trying the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
by both young and other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Recently the Indian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
provides the schemes and subsidy for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
won't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
the business. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
the unemployment problem and have been increasing the chance of getting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
for freshers and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
holders.

In Conclusion
, The chances of getting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
will be less for non-experience holders, if the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
tried both freshers and experienced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
persons
. The best solution to encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
persons
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have an interest in starting their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
firm by providing schemes.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
36Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
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Munia Khan

IELTS essay Nowadays more and more people have to compete with young people for the same jobs. What problems does this cause? What are some possible solutions? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
307 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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