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Nowadays more and more older people compete with young people for the same jobs. What can be the reasons for this? What would you suggest as a solution? v.1

Nowadays more and more older people compete with young people for the same jobs. What can be the reasons for this? What would you suggest as a solution? v. 1
In seeking for employment there is a tight competition among job seekers. In this situation, the older people are not exempted. They often compete with young professionals in seeking for a job. This situation disadvantages the elderly job seeker and if they were successful in landing a job, their costumer and company may be affected in a negative way. Older people have the lesser chance in landing a job compared to the young one due to their slower motor skill. Elderly people are slow due to their age. They cannot move as fast as the young people and employer may see this as a drawback in employing them. For instance, in a restaurant, being a waiter requires that you are quick is serving customers and this cannot be done by old people. For jobs which require an experience and knowledge, for example, system administrator and computer programmer older people have the edge over young people and likely to be hired. Young and inexperienced professional may have a hard time in landing a job due to their elderly competitor. There are several ways to mitigate these issues. One of which is to categorize job according to age. Employers should have an age limit in recruiting for a certain job position. For example, in looking for a Cadet Engineer young and inexperienced professional should be the only one allowed to apply. In addition, A training must be conducted among elderly job seeker to become competitive against young graduates. If they acquire the skills that they need for the job they will become as valuable as their young competitor.
In seeking for employment there is a tight competition among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
seekers. In this situation, the older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not exempted. They
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
compete with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
professionals in seeking for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. This situation disadvantages the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
seeker and if they were successful in landing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, their costumer and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
may be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
way.

Older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have the lesser chance in landing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
compared to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
one due to their slower motor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are slow due to their age. They cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and employer may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
this as a drawback in employing them.
For instance
, in a restaurant, being a waiter requires that you are quick is serving customers and this cannot
be done
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
which require an experience and knowledge,
for example
, system administrator and computer programmer older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have the edge over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and likely to
be hired
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Young
and inexperienced professional may have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
time in landing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
due to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
competitor.

There are several ways to mitigate these issues. One of which is to categorize
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
according to age. Employers should have an age limit in recruiting for a certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
position.
For example
, in looking for a Cadet Engineer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
and inexperienced professional should be the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to apply.
In addition
,

A training
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be conducted
among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
seeker to become competitive against
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
graduates. If they acquire the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
that they need for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
they will become as valuable as their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
competitor.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
29Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
The most intimate temper of a people, its deepest soul, is above all in its language.
Jules Michelet

IELTS essay Nowadays more and more older people compete with young people for the same jobs. What can be the reasons for this? What would you suggest as a solution? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
266 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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