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Nowadays many people believe that children should be taught history in schools, however, others argue that children should learn subjects that are more helpful for modern everyday life. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.2

Nowadays many people believe that children should be taught history in schools, however, others argue that children should learn subjects that are more helpful for modern everyday life. v. 2
The ever-growing population is a universal issue; as a result, governments across the world are struggling to meet the housing needs of their citizens. In my view, people should have options to choose their style of houses, but not at the cost of environmental destruction. This essay will discuss the exigency of this issue and plausible measures to tackle the dire straits. To commence with, shelter is one of the basic needs of human beings, and it cannot be compromised. Governments across the world are exploring various options to meet not only the accommodations of people but also to provide them with their suitable choice of stay. Not every individual has the same taste and economic standard; hence, it is obvious for people to look for a home, based on their needs. For instance, a high achiever would not like to stay in the small one-bedroom living room, as he or she works hard to reach at this level and deserve a better lifestyle. This is how social structure can be maintained and people will aspire to be successful in order to better their living standards. On the flip side, building more houses as per people's needs, often come at the cost of deforestation, which directly affects the biodiversity of this world. Whilst, the real estate agencies are tirelessly building sprawling residences, they tend to ignore the environmental damage, and keep cutting woods deliberately. This is a pertinent issue and the government needs to strike a balance between needs to build residences for it’s' citizens and at the same time, keep the environment green and healthy. Furthermore, leaders are not at the loss of options to tackle this immediate issue, there are some plausible remedies, which can be looked at. One of the solutions could be, building apartments vertically than horizontally. This way plenty of space can be saved without compromising on the quality of housing. To illustrate, If one 2 bedroom house requires 800 square feet of area, then 10 houses would need 8000 square feet at least. In contrast if the apartments are built vertically as a 10 storey building, only 800 square feet of the surface area are required. In addition, Colonies can be built in the barren lands, which will save our green jungles. These uncultivated areas are a good option for building skyscrapers, which will be a perfect solution to build an appropriate abode for people. For example, The Gujrat government in India built a whole new city in the “Kachh” desert. This kind of farsightedness of state government shows how to satisfy the shelter need for the citizen. In conclusion, the need for affordable and suitable accommodation will only increase in the future. Hence, Leaders should be proactive and work with their bureaucrats to be ready with options, and they should not ignore the environmental well being. Human beings can only prosper if they respect nature and co-exist together.
The ever-growing population is a universal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
;
as a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
across the world are struggling to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
of their citizens. In my view,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
options
to choose their style of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not at the cost of environmental destruction. This essay will discuss the exigency of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
and plausible measures to tackle the dire straits.

To commence with, shelter is one of the basic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
of human beings, and it cannot
be compromised
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Governments
across the world are exploring various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
options
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
the accommodations of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to provide them with their suitable choice of stay. Not every individual has the same taste and economic standard;
hence
, it is obvious for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to look for a home, based on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
.
For instance
, a high achiever would not like to stay in the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
one-bedroom living room, as he or she works
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to reach at this level and deserve a better lifestyle. This is how social structure can
be maintained
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will aspire to be successful in order to better their living standards. On the flip side,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
as per
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
at the cost of deforestation, which
directly
affects the biodiversity of this world. Whilst, the real estate agencies are
tirelessly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
sprawling residences, they tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
the environmental damage, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
cutting woods
deliberately
. This is a pertinent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
to strike a balance between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
to build residences for it’s' citizens and at the same time,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the environment green and healthy.

Furthermore
, leaders are not at the loss of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
options
to tackle this immediate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
plausible remedies, which can
be looked
at. One of the solutions could be,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
apartments
Use "(vertically)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
vertically
than
horizontally
. This way
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of space can
be saved
without compromising on the quality of housing. To illustrate, If one
It appears that a hyphen is missing.
2 bedroom
Possible agreement error. The noun 'house' seems to be countable, so consider using: "houses".
house
requires
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
800 square feet
of area, then 10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
8000 square feet
at least. In
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
contrast
if the apartments
are built
vertically
as a
When a number forms part of an adjectival compound, use a hyphen: "10-storey"
10 storey
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
800 square feet
of the surface area
are required
.
In addition
, Colonies can
be built
in the barren lands, which will save our green jungles. These uncultivated areas are a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
option
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
skyscrapers, which will be a perfect solution to build an appropriate abode for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For example
, The
Possible spelling mistake found.
Gujrat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
in India built a whole new city in the “
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kachh
” desert. This kind of farsightedness of state
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
how to satisfy the shelter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
for the citizen.

In conclusion
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
for affordable and suitable accommodation will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
increase in the future.
Hence
, Leaders should be proactive and work with their bureaucrats to be ready with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
options
, and they should not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
the environmental
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well being
. Human beings can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
prosper if they respect nature and co-exist together.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay Nowadays many people believe that children should be taught history in schools, however, others argue that children should learn subjects that are more helpful for modern everyday life. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
485 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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