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Nowadays, for work reasons, many families move to other countries. Some people believe that the children in these families benefit from this. Others believe that it makes life more difficult for the children. Discuss both these views and give your own opi v.1

Nowadays, for work reasons, many families move to other countries. Some people believe that the children in these families benefit from this. Others believe that it makes life more difficult for the children. 1
The huge number of workers do not spend enough time to work out whether they are occupying with their duty or they are free, and it has some negative subsequent impacts on these people's health. This essay Will describe how heavy workloads have influenced the desire to exercise as the principle cause and suggest some flexible schedules as a possible Solution. These days, the poor work-life balance are especially apparent because of the current economic climate. The job markets around the world has become increasingly competitive and Employers and managers have their workers work long hours, since the global financial crisis. The working people must work really hard, and so they have no enough leisure time. As they have no time to rest, the tendency to do things like exercise has also reduced. It also requires a significant amount of energy to plan for and do it regularly that would not be available under these working pressures. To solve this problem, it is recommended to bring them adjustable schedules in order to have more free time during a week. There is also a survey that shows people care more about their health related issues when they are under less stress Stress or tension, which is not tension, which is not occurring unless managers hire more workers with less work load. To conclude the majority of working people are suffering from some health problems due to lack of desire to some activities like sport trainings, One of the most significant reasons is the heavy workload and some measures around this issue, such as increasing the number of workers should be taken.
The huge number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
do not spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
out whether they are occupying with their
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
duty or
they are free, and it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
subsequent impacts on these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's health. This essay Will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
how heavy workloads have influenced the desire to exercise as the
Did you mean "principal" (=main)?
principle
cause and suggest
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
flexible schedules as a possible Solution.

These days, the poor work-life balance are
especially
apparent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
economic climate. The job markets around the world has become
increasingly
competitive and Employers and managers have their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
long hours, since the global financial crisis. The working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they have no
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. As they have no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to rest, the tendency to do things like exercise has
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
. It
also
requires a significant amount of energy to plan for and do it
regularly
that would not be available under these working pressures.

To solve this problem, it
is recommended
to bring them adjustable schedules in order to have more free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
during a week. There is
also
a survey that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
care more about their health related issues when they are under less
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress


This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Stress
or tension, which is not tension, which is not occurring unless managers hire more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
with less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
load.

To conclude
the majority of working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are suffering from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
health problems due to lack of desire to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
activities like sport trainings, One of the most significant reasons is the heavy workload and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
measures around this issue, such as increasing the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
should
be taken
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays, for work reasons, many families move to other countries. Some people believe that the children in these families benefit from this. Others believe that it makes life more difficult for the children. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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