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Nowadays, children watch TV more than they did in the part. What are the reasons? Give some solutions? v.1

Nowadays, children watch TV more than they did in the part. What are the reasons? Give some solutions? v. 1
In recent years, the problem of children get addicted to TV programs has been receiving a great deal of public attention. Although this problem can be attributed to a whole host of reasons, some feasible solutions can be considered to address this. There are a number of reasons to explain for this. First, since TV programs provide attractive and new contents at disposal, which evokes their curiosity, children tend to binge - watch most of the time. Second, by doing work and earning money constantly to meet the standard of living, parents pay less attention to their children. This means that children have no many choices in taking part in activities, either playing sport or having a talk with their parents. Therefore, kids often resort to watching for relaxation and mental rewards. However, there are some solutions which are given to solve this problems. First, in order to diminish TV addition of children, setting a daily limit is necessary. For example, a kid will spend time on useful activities, such as playing sport or reading books in lieu of getting in a virtual world of TV programs, which helps them to be not depend on TV’s impacts. Second, if fun alternatives are provided, like parks, art club or soft - skill courses, kids will have more ways to relax. This means that these choices attracts children and guide them in a positive trends which consists of useful and the bigger the better contents, thus makes children become proactive in life. In conclusion, the disadvantages of this trend will be far more significant. By focusing on the pros and cons, society and parents can make the appropriate decision.
In recent years, the problem of
children
get
addicted to TV programs has been receiving a great deal of public attention. Although this problem can
be attributed
to a whole host of reasons,
some
feasible solutions can
be considered
to address this.

There are a number of reasons to
explain
for this.
First
, since TV programs provide attractive and new contents at disposal, which evokes their curiosity,
children
tend to binge
-
watch
most of the time. Second, by doing work and earning money
constantly
to
meet
the standard of living, parents pay less attention to their
children
. This means that
children
have
no
many
choices in taking part in activities, either playing sport or having a talk with their parents.
Therefore
, kids
often
resort to watching for relaxation and mental rewards.

However
, there are
some
solutions which are
given
to solve
this
problems.
First
, in order to diminish TV addition of
children
, setting a daily limit is necessary.
For example
, a kid will spend time on useful activities, such as playing sport or reading books in lieu of getting in a virtual world of TV programs, which
helps
them to be not
depend
on TV’s impacts. Second, if fun alternatives
are provided
, like parks, art club or soft
-
skill
courses, kids will have more ways to relax. This means that these choices attracts
children
and guide them in a
positive
trends which consists of useful and the bigger the better contents,
thus
makes
children
become proactive in life.

In conclusion
, the disadvantages of this trend will be far more significant. By focusing on the pros and cons, society and parents can
make
the appropriate decision.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS essay Nowadays, children watch TV more than they did in the part. What are the reasons? Give some solutions? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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