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Nowadays a few people take their family with them to abroad whenever they go for a business trip. What are the advantages and disadvantages on them and on their family. v.1

Nowadays a few people take their family with them to abroad whenever they go for a business trip. What are the advantages and disadvantages on them and on their family. v. 1
Some people take their family along to an abroad business trip. I believe that this can bring several advantages for every family member as well as disadvantages. Several advantages of the decision of taking the family abroad can be mentioned. The first one is that a person would not be alone in his journey and be supported by his family. They would not miss each other because they would stay together. The second positive aspect is that every member can enjoy a new experience of being abroad. They, for example, can learn a new language or new cultures by meeting local people or visiting local sightseeing. This is especially important for children as new cultures and experiences can influence their minds. Some demerits should be also noticed when people take their family for an abroad trip. One of them is that it can not only be enjoyable but also stressful. For a person who is doing a job there, it can be a new environment where they should learn things quickly. For example, a person might need to communicate with other people in a second language. In the beginning, with limited abilities, it can be a frustrating experience. Another aspect is that moving abroad for a long time requires some initial organization. For instance, for children, it needs to be found a kindergarten or school. However, sometimes the employer can help with this aspect. In conclusion, moving with family to a foreign country for a business trip could bring some positive aspects such as new experiences and be around with family members, however, the disadvantages of this conclude some stressful situations and initial organizational difficulties.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
take their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
along to an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
business trip. I believe that this can bring several advantages for every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
member
as well
as disadvantages.

Several advantages of the decision of taking the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
can
be mentioned
. The
first
one is that a person would not be alone in his journey and
be supported
by his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
. They would not miss each other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they would stay together. The second
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspect is that every member can enjoy a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
of being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
. They,
for example
, can learn a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
language or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
cultures by meeting local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
or visiting local sightseeing. This is
especially
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for children as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
cultures and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
can influence their minds.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
demerits should be
also
noticed when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
take their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
for an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
trip. One of them is that it can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be enjoyable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
stressful. For a person who is doing a job there, it can be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
environment where they should learn things
quickly
.
For example
, a person might need to communicate with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in a second language. In the beginning, with limited abilities, it can be a frustrating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
. Another aspect is that moving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
for a long time requires
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
initial organization.
For instance
, for children, it needs to
be found
a kindergarten or school.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
the employer can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
with this aspect.

In conclusion
, moving with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
to a foreign country for a business trip could bring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspects such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
and be around with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members,
however
, the disadvantages of this conclude
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
stressful situations and initial organizational difficulties.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
Learn everything you can, anytime you can, from anyone you can; there will always come a time when you will be grateful you did.
Sarah Caldwell

IELTS essay Nowadays a few people take their family with them to abroad whenever they go for a business trip. What are the advantages and disadvantages on them and on their family. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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