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Pressure on the school and university students is increasing and students are pushed too hard work when they are young. Do you think it is a positive or negative development? v.1

Pressure on the school and university students is increasing and students are pushed too hard work when they are young. Do you think it is a positive or negative development? v. 1
Nowadays, education playing a vital role in every people's lives. In recent days, learners are pressured by the school and university and this growing as well as students have to do too hard work when they are not much older. I largely believe. It is a negative improvement. My reasons are justified further Discussing the reasons the students are pressured that's why they are doing it if they do not do it by heart, they can't learn and understand it and which is not useful. In addition to that, sometimes children do not have interest on the subject even though they pressurised and they have to do which effect mentally on them, they feel stressed and so do wrong things, which sometimes create an impact on their families or personally. Moreover, sometimes in the school children which are not capable of doing so much hard task the school put pressure on them to do and create a bad influence because the students which are not capable they think they will fail and do wrong things. Similarly, some projects are given to them which are too much time consuming and they have to submit it in a short time and for that they have to work day and night so that's why some health issues are faced by them. Some students cannot handle that much mental pressure so they take wrong steps which effect badly on them Overall. It can be concluded education is a very important part of the life, but if we pressurised children to do it which are young to do it, it affects negatively to their life and mental abilities.
Nowadays, education playing a vital role in every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. In recent days, learners
are pressured
by the school and university and this growing
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do too
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work when they are not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
older. I
largely
believe. It is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
improvement. My reasons
are justified
further


Discussing the reasons the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are pressured
that's why they are doing it if they do not do it by heart, they can't learn and understand it and which is not useful.
In addition
to that,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
children do not have interest on the subject
even though
they
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
pressurised and
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do which effect mentally on them, they feel
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
things, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
create an impact on their families or
personally
.

Moreover
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
in the school children which are not capable of doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
task the school put pressure on them to do and create a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
influence
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
which are not capable they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
they will fail and do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
things.
Similarly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
projects are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to them which are too
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
time consuming
and they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
submit it in a short time and for that they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work day and night
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that's why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
health issues
are faced
by them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
cannot handle that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
mental pressure
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
steps which effect
badly
on
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
them


Overall
. It can
be concluded
education is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part of the life,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if we
Possible spelling mistake. 'pressurised' is British English.
pressurised
children to do it which are young to do it, it affects
negatively
to their life and mental abilities.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Pressure on the school and university students is increasing and students are pushed too hard work when they are young. Do you think it is a positive or negative development? v. 1

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
273 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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