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Now the machines is very complex and a lot of difficult work is automated. Does this machine automation have more proses than cons? v.1

21st century from its beginning known as 'era of transformation' Most important transformation is invention of lots of complex machine. Which helps to improve our lifestyle. Although use of automatic machine in different fields offer many advantages, yet their excessive use may cause some disadvantages. I personaly believe, by use of machines we make our life Smooth and easy going. In this essay first I will discuss many useful roll of mac hine as well as some backfire of machine automation. Firstly, world stands on the level where all works from cash counting to other daily chores depend more or Less upon machines. People use things such as washing machines, Ovens in kitchen. also such things like cash counting machines, card swiping machine in all shops and banks. These innovations help us to cope up with fast going life by reducing time consumption and energy of work. As an epitome, many countries encourage their scientist to make Roborts who act similar to human being and work fast and in better way. One Japanese company launch roberts who complete work of three to four people at short period of time And japan is first country who opened restorant in which roborts serve as waiters. Furthermore, Some machines like automatic lift use in every building also in hospitals. Lift and escallators are very useful to medicaly ill person to reduce stress. Also washing machine nowadays found in every house. which reduces work load of cloth wash to women. This cloth washing every day may lead such sever day may orthopedic condition, such as early osteoarthrities, back pain etc so machine use helps to decline these problem of women. On the other side, there are some drawbacks of automation. As all automatic machines consume more electricity or fuel. Also all machines are very expensive and maintanance of machines cost more. Another main problem face by humans is dependancy, because all of us depend upon machine if there is any issue cause break in usage of that machine affect humans more. To pen down, usage of automatic machines offer some disadvantages but we can easily overcome that issues, so there is more advantage of automatation than disadvantages.
21st century from its beginning known as 'era of transformation' Most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
transformation

is invention of lots of complex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
.
“Which” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Which
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helps


to
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improve
our lifestyle. Although
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use
of
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automatic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
in
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different
fields offer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages,
yet
their excessive
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use
may cause
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some
disadvantages. I
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personaly
believe, by
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use
of
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machines
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
our life Smooth and easy going. In this essay
first
I will discuss
Possible agreement error. The noun roll seems to be countable; consider using: “many useful rolls”.
many useful roll
of
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mac hine
as well
as
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some
backfire of
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machine
automation.

Firstly
, world stands on the level where all works from cash counting to other daily chores depend more or Less upon
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machines
.
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People
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use
things such as washing
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machines
, Ovens in kitchen.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
also
such things like cash counting
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machines
, card swiping
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machine
in all shops and banks. These innovations
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help
us to cope up with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
going life by reducing time consumption and energy of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. As an epitome,
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many
countries encourage their scientist to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
Possible spelling mistake found.
Roborts
who act similar to human being and
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work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
and in better way. One Japanese
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company
launch
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roberts
who complete
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work
of three to four
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people
at short period of time And
This noun needs to be capitalized if you mean the country “Japan”.
japan
is
first
country who opened
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restorant
in which
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roborts
serve as waiters.

Furthermore
,
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Some
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machines
like
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automatic
lift
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use
in every building
also
in hospitals. Lift and
Possible spelling mistake found.
escallators
are
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very
useful to
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medicaly
ill person to
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reduce
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
.
Also
washing
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machine
nowadays found in every
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house
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
which
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reduces
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work
load of cloth wash to women. This cloth washing every day may lead such sever day may orthopedic condition, such as early
Possible spelling mistake found.
osteoarthrities
, back pain
Use a comma before ‘so’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
etc
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
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machine
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to decline
‘These’ does not seem to match the singular noun ‘problem’. Did you mean “this problem” or “these problems”?
these problem
of women.

On the other side, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks of automation. As all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
automatic
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machines
consume more electricity or fuel.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
all
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machines
are
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very
expensive and
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maintanance
of
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machines
cost more. Another main problem face by humans is
Possible spelling mistake found.
dependancy
,
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because
all of us depend upon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
if there is any issue cause break in usage of that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
affect humans more.

To pen down, usage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
automatic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
offer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we can
easily
overcome that issues,
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so
there is more advantage of
Possible spelling mistake found.
automatation
than disadvantages.
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The limits of my language are the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay Now the machine is very complex and lot of difficult work is automated. Does this machine automation have more pros than cons?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
363 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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