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News Media is more influential nowadays and some people think it is a negative development. to what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

News Media is more influential nowadays and some people think it is a negative development. v. 1
The debate weather we should be concerned by the level of influence that the news media have over the population or not, has become a matter of discussion for many. I completely agree with the view that it is an alarming issue, which requires immediate actions. In this essay, I shall outline the supporting arguments for my view. To start with, there are numerous predominant factors, which suggest that it is a negative development. News channels often run fake or over dramatised news to gain more views of the audience. For example, a recent study conducted at the Stanford University, revealed that 65% of media channels were involved in airing the fake news. Many times this leads the public into believing in something that could not be far from the truth. Moreover, it is not uncommon to see the people running these news media sources, demanding a large sum of money from famous personalities or politicians, in order to hide the certain information from the public. In case, If they refuse to cooperate, the history is also full of incidents, when the leak of a sensitive information resulted in damaging multiple people's live. In conclusion, this is a topic which raises many questions in contemporary life. From the given arguments and examples, I am inclined to say that I support the viewpoint which says that today the level of influence these news sources have, is a very dangerous sign. In the future, we could expect to see improvement only if we work together against stopping the spread of fake news in the public.
The debate weather we should
be concerned
by the level of influence that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
media have over the population or not, has become a matter of discussion for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the view that it is an alarming issue, which requires immediate actions. In this essay, I shall outline the supporting arguments for my view.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, there are numerous predominant factors, which suggest that it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
News
channels
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
run fake or over
Possible spelling mistake. 'dramatised' is British English.
dramatised
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
to gain more views of the audience.
For example
, a recent study conducted at the Stanford University, revealed that 65% of media channels
were involved
in airing the fake
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
times this leads the public into believing in something that could not be far from the truth.

Moreover
, it is not uncommon to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
running these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
media sources, demanding a large sum of money from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
personalities or politicians, in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hide
the certain information from the public. In case, If they refuse to cooperate, the history is
also
full of incidents, when the leak of
'information' is a mass noun (i.e., uncountable). Therefore, the preceding 'a' is probably wrong.
a sensitive information
resulted in damaging multiple
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.

In conclusion
, this is a topic which raises
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
questions in contemporary life. From the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
arguments and examples, I
am inclined
to say that I support the viewpoint which says that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
the level of influence these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
sources have, is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
. In the future, we could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
improvement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
if we work together against stopping the spread of fake
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
in the public.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay News Media is more influential nowadays and some people think it is a negative development. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
263 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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