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More people decided to have children in their later age than in the past. Why? Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages? v.3

More people decided to have children in their later age than in the past. Why? Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages? v. 3
The world resources are in danger. Although human are fully aware of the importance of biodiversity, their activities are threatening the ecosystem in many ways that are leading to the extinction of species and degradation in biodiversity. This essay will discuss the many causes of the loss of biodiversity and the extinction of species while providing some solutions to solve them. There are several causes of loss of biodiversity that generated as a part of human works. Firstly, the level of the pollution has been doubled in the last decades, resulting from the oil and transportation systems. Due to this fact, many species are directly impacted and threatened. For example, the oil spils in the oceans killed many sea creatures. Secondly, the deforestation activities for the green areas due to the expansion of the constructions is increasing the level of greenhouse gases, which contribute to the global warming. To tackle these issues both the governments and the individuals should be involved. The governments should start conducting awareness campaigns to educate the people. Because of this, the people will start receiving information about the importance of the ecosystem, the known problems and the solutions. For instance, in the USA the government runs a monthly session about biodiversity for education purpose. Furthermore, individuals should start acting with more responsibility toward the environment, they can start relaying on the public transportation systems rather than using their own cars. This will reduce the level of greenhouse gases in the air and the demand for the oil. To sum up, there are many human actions that are putting the biodiversity and the species in danger. I profoundly believe if the governments and individuals are implementing the measurements mentioned in this essay they will be able to mitigate these issues in a timely manner.
The world resources are in
danger
. Although human are
fully
aware of the importance of biodiversity, their activities are threatening the ecosystem in
many
ways that are leading to the extinction of species and degradation in biodiversity. This essay will discuss the
many
causes of the loss of biodiversity and the extinction of species while providing
some
solutions to solve them.

There are several causes of loss of biodiversity that generated as a part of human works.
Firstly
, the level of the pollution has
been doubled
in the last decades, resulting from the oil and transportation systems. Due to this fact,
many
species are
directly
impacted and threatened.
For example
, the oil
spils
in the oceans killed
many
sea creatures.
Secondly
, the deforestation activities for the green areas due to the expansion of the constructions is increasing the level of greenhouse gases, which contribute to the global warming.

To tackle these issues both the
governments
and the individuals should
be involved
. The
governments
should
start
conducting awareness campaigns to educate the
people
.
Because of this
, the
people
will
start
receiving information about the importance of the ecosystem, the known problems and the solutions.
For instance
, in the USA the
government
runs a monthly session about biodiversity for education purpose.
Furthermore
, individuals should
start
acting with more responsibility toward the environment, they can
start
relaying on the public transportation systems
rather
than using their
own
cars. This will
reduce
the level of greenhouse gases in the air and the demand for the oil.

To sum up, there are
many
human actions that are putting the biodiversity and the species in
danger
. I
profoundly
believe if the
governments
and individuals are implementing the measurements mentioned in this essay they will be able to mitigate these issues in a timely manner.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay More people decided to have children in their later age than in the past. Why? Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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