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More houses are needed in many countries to cope with increasing populations. Would it be better to build houses in existing towns and cities, or to develop new towns in rural areas? v.5

Stepping in the golden era, unbelievably an outstanding achievement the new 21st century also witnessed as a considerable change nowadays, more accommodation are required in various nations to face with overpopulation. According to my perspective, it will be better to improve a house in urban areas. Why, I think it is a better option I will discussed it in upcoming verses. In addition to that population increase day by day and it grow the problem related to house in many nations. For the better life numerous of people improve their living standard in suburbs because in that area library facilities is outstanding and the education system higher than the rural areas. All the well reputated schools, colleges and universities also developed in cities. In other words we can say that the top notched education system provide the online classes which are not available in countryside area as well as nobody can know about that. Furthermore, sports facilities are also good in urban areas. Many of the students take interest to participate in the sports and achieve more oppournities. Moreover, in the municipality government bulit new premises if there are poor working environment. Various new project are hold for better future. To add on it, in the conurbation there are plethora of works available for students, women and mens and the transport facility also available for late night. Commute can go to office by walk, by cycle as well as by public transport. Learners can do the part time jobs and many home based job available for housewives and others who are not go outside for doing job. Both partner do job and earn good salary. What else, big industries such as honda company, infosys, birla and so on. To site an example, my elder got married before one year and she was live in a burg. My sister and her husband doing work in well known company. Both are enjoy their life and save money for bright future. On the above confabulation, to improve the home in the municipality very helpful for all people because no one can live separate with their family.
Stepping in the golden era,
unbelievably
an outstanding achievement the new 21st century
also
witnessed as a considerable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
nowadays, more accommodation
are required
in various nations to face with overpopulation. According to my perspective, it will be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
in urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. Why, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
option I will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "discuss"
discussed
it in upcoming verses.
In addition
to that population increase day by day and it
Did you mean "grows"?
grow
the problem related to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
nations. For the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
life numerous of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their living standard in suburbs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
in that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
library facilities is outstanding and the education system higher than the rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. All the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
Possible spelling mistake found.
reputated
schools, colleges and universities
also
developed in cities.
In other words
we can say that the top notched education system provide the online classes which are not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
available
in countryside
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as nobody can know about that.
Furthermore
, sports facilities are
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
in urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
of the students take interest to participate in the sports and achieve more
Possible spelling mistake found.
oppournities
.
Moreover
, in the municipality
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
Possible spelling mistake found.
bulit
new premises if there are poor working environment. Various new project are hold for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
future. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
on it, in the conurbation there are plethora of works
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
available
for students, women and
Possible spelling mistake found.
mens
and the transport facility
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
available
for late night. Commute can go to office by walk, by cycle as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as by public transport. Learners can do the
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
part time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
home based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
available
for housewives
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
who are not
Consider using a past participle here: "gone".
go
outside for doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. Both partner do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and earn
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
salary. What else,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
industries such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
honda
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
infosys
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
birla
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. To site an example, my elder
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
married
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
one
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
year and
she was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a burg. My sister and her husband doing work in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
known
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
. Both are
Consider using a past participle here: "enjoyed".
enjoy
their life and save money for bright future. On the above confabulation, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the home in the municipality
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
helpful for all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
no one can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
separate with their family.
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IELTS essay More houses are needed in many countries to cope with increasing populations. Would it be better to build house in existing towns and cities, or to develop new towns in rural areas? What is your opinion?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
353 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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