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More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem? v.9

Day by day the number of wild animals which are under threat of becoming extinct is increasing. There are several reasons why this is a case and a wide range of remedities could be used to tackle the issue. The main reasons for this trend are highly related to climate change and illegal logging. In terms of the former, the alterations, for the worse, in the climate tremendously affect the natural habitant of wild animals. Specifically, the global warming gives rise to desertification and consequently hinder the ability of animals to find adequate resources for their survival. In other words, some animals have not evolved in a way that they can handle the absence of water for a long time. In fact, after some period without proper eating and drinking they will be much easier preys to hunt. Second reason is illegal logging. Cutting down excessive amounts of trees have an profound influence on the biodiversity. Specifically, animals which have been living in rainforests adapted their body to the absence of the light during their evolution. This propensity caused them to have particular colours which prevent predators to see them easily in the shadow. Which natural shield become useless in the presence of sun light. Ultimately, these two reasons possess a great threat to the continuity of wild life. However, this issue could be mitigated by various measures. The carbon dioxide emission is the main reason behind the climate change. In order to diminish the amount of gas that is released into atmosphere government can levy a tax on the manufacturers if they surpass some particular amount in order to create incentive for them to use environmentally friendly machines and technics. Secondly, the illegal logging can be alleviated by the joint forces of government and society. Government can create teams which are consist of local people in order to supervise and to protect the forests. Should the government and the society take the necessary steps, wild animals can be protected by adverse impacts of human actions. In conclusion, some reasons why the animals go extinct can be identified, and some solutions can be implemented.
Day by day the number of wild
animals
which are under threat of becoming extinct is increasing. There are several
reasons
why this is a case and a wide range of
remedities
could be
used
to tackle the issue.

The main
reasons
for this trend are
highly
related to climate
change
and illegal logging. In terms of the former, the alterations, for the worse, in the climate
tremendously
affect the natural habitant of wild
animals
.
Specifically
, the global warming gives rise to desertification and
consequently
hinder the ability of
animals
to find adequate resources for their survival.
In other words
,
some
animals
have not evolved in a way that they can handle the absence of water for a long time. In fact, after
some
period without proper eating and drinking they will be much easier preys to hunt. Second
reason
is illegal logging. Cutting down excessive amounts of trees have
an
profound influence on the biodiversity.
Specifically
,
animals
which have been living in rainforests adapted their body to the absence of the light during their evolution. This propensity caused them to have particular
colours
which
prevent
predators to
see
them
easily
in the shadow.
Which
natural shield become useless in the presence of
sun light
.
Ultimately
, these two
reasons
possess a great threat to the continuity of wild life.

However
, this issue could
be mitigated
by various measures. The carbon dioxide emission is the main
reason
behind the climate
change
. In order to diminish the amount of gas that
is released
into atmosphere
government
can levy a tax on the manufacturers if they surpass
some
particular amount in order to create incentive for them to
use
environmentally
friendly machines and technics.
Secondly
, the illegal logging can
be alleviated
by the joint forces of
government
and society.
Government
can create teams which are consist of local
people
in order to supervise and to protect the forests. Should the
government
and the society take the necessary steps, wild
animals
can
be protected
by adverse impacts of human actions.

In conclusion
,
some
reasons
why the
animals
go extinct can
be identified
, and
some
solutions can
be implemented
.
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IELTS essay More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
354 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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