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More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem? v.2

More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem? v. 2
Some wild animals are going to totally disappear from the world and many are at the risk to be completely died for the world. This essay will tell the cause of these situations and also discuss the solution for this. Nowadays, its becoming the main issue in the world that many species of wild creatures are going to eliminate in upcoming years and also many are listed in danger to be finished from the world. The main reason is that hunting these animals is a trend and a hobby for some people. They visit the jungles and kill them for their internal relaxation that is causing a big issue for animals. Sea creatures are also facing this problem. Sea generation also facing the pollution problems by the waste of humans that is thrown in the water. Another issue is construction of buildings and demolishing of forest lands. When land is used for public with buildings and other resources, these animals move to some other areas which are not suitable for them and they loss their lives. At that time, many animals started walking in between the public areas, and due to fears in people, security and locals kill them to save their own lives. Like in India, mostly lions, cheetahs or leopards attack people in societies where these residents to shoot them. Due to this, now in the India lions category is less than before. The solution of this problem is that government has to take full response by taking care of the woodlands, sea areas. They have to restrict hunting and giving punishments to them who disobey the rules. Public humans also have a responsibility that they have to check that, are they harming the animals. Are they making some difficulties to these breeds in their living? Everyone has to control on these events, so that these species grow up and remain until the end of the world. These are the beauty of world and also important to us. Disappearance of animals from the world rising from decades that is a very sad thing for us. We have to take some big steps to control this and giving full opportunities for the wild animals to live in this world.
Some
wild
animals
are going to
totally
disappear from the
world
and
many
are at the
risk
to be completely
died
for the
world
. This essay will
tell
the cause of these situations and
also
discuss the solution for this.

Nowadays, its becoming the main issue in the
world
that
many
species of wild creatures are going to eliminate in upcoming years and
also
many
are listed
in
danger
to
be finished
from the
world
. The main reason is that hunting these
animals
is a trend and a hobby for
some
people
. They visit the jungles and kill them for their internal relaxation
that is
causing a
big
issue for
animals
. Sea creatures are
also
facing this problem. Sea generation
also
facing the pollution problems by the waste of humans that
is thrown
in the water. Another issue is construction of buildings and demolishing of forest lands. When land is
used
for public with buildings and other resources, these
animals
move
to
some
other areas which are not suitable for
them and
they
loss
their
lives
. At that time,
many
animals
started
walking in between the public areas, and due to fears in
people
, security and locals kill them to save their
own
lives
. Like in India,
mostly
lions, cheetahs or leopards attack
people
in societies where these residents to shoot them. Due to this,
now
in the India lions category is less than
before
.

The solution of this problem is that
government
has to
take full response by taking care of the woodlands, sea areas. They
have to
restrict hunting and giving punishments to them who disobey the
rules
. Public humans
also
have a responsibility that they
have to
check
that, are they harming the
animals
. Are they making
some
difficulties to these breeds in their living? Everyone
has to
control on these
events
,
so
that these species grow up and remain until the
end
of the
world
. These are the beauty of
world
and
also
important
to us.

Disappearance of
animals
from the
world
rising from decades
that is
a
very
sad thing for us. We
have to
take
some
big
steps to control this and giving full opportunities for the wild
animals
to
live
in this
world
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Charlemagne

IELTS essay More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
370 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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