Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

More and more students are choosing to study at colleges and universities in a foreign country. Do the benefits of studying abroad outweigh the drawbacks? v.6

More and more students are choosing to study at colleges and universities in a foreign country. Do the benefits of studying abroad outweigh the drawbacks? v. 6
The number of students going abroad for higher education has increased tremendously in the contemporary world. In my opinion, leaving one’s own country for higher education eventually brings more problems than advantages. Admittedly, there are some basic benefits of studying in a foreign country. Firstly, the student gets a chance to find employment in overseas markets after the completion of their course. Since salaries are higher in these countries, their financial situation will definitely improve when they work abroad. Secondly, overseas programs provide them with an opportunity to study with students of other nations. This in turn, not only develops their communication skills but also encourages them to think in a different manner, as they socialize with students of an entirely different society. Nevertheless, despite the advantages mentioned above, I believe that there are some serious disadvantages to studying abroad. One of the major problems is that students who study abroad do not contribute to their own country economy. To illustrate, migration of skilled people to other countries has slowed down the development of countries like India. Students who should) have been entrepreneurs in their own country, are seen running successful businesses and paying taxes in other countries. Another potential problem of studying abroad is that students have to pay the higher fee for their studies. They often have to work part time to fund their studies and this takes their focus away from their studies. Another issue is that living away from families in a highly competitive environment leads to a stressful life. This could be one of the main reasons that provoke students to commit serious crimes. To conclude, people may have different opinions, but I believe that the major drawbacks of going abroad for higher studies far outweigh the minor advantages. This trend affects the economic growth of their own country and also makes life stressful for them.
The number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
going
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
for higher education has increased
tremendously
in the contemporary world. In my opinion, leaving one’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
for higher education
eventually
brings more problems than advantages.

Admittedly
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
basic benefits of studying in a foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
Firstly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
a chance to find employment in overseas markets after the completion of their course. Since salaries are higher in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, their financial situation will definitely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
when they work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
.
Secondly
, overseas programs provide them with an opportunity to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
of other nations. This in turn, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
develops their communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
encourages them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
manner, as they socialize with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
of an
entirely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
society.

Nevertheless
, despite the advantages mentioned above, I believe that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
serious disadvantages to studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
. One of the major problems is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
do not contribute to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
economy. To illustrate, migration of skilled
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
has slowed down the development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like India.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
who should
Unpaired symbol: '(' seems to be missing
)
have been entrepreneurs in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
running successful businesses and paying taxes in other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. Another potential problem of studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay the higher fee for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
. They
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
part time
to fund their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
and this takes their focus away from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
. Another issue is that living away from families in a
highly
competitive environment leads to a stressful life. This could be one of the main reasons that provoke
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to commit serious crimes.

To conclude
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
may have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
opinions,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I believe that the major drawbacks of going
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
for higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
far outweigh the minor advantages. This trend affects the economic growth of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
life stressful for them.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
29Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
He who knows no foreign languages know nothing of his own.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS essay More and more students are choosing to study at colleges and universities in a foreign country. Do the benefits of studying abroad outweigh the drawbacks? v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
311 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts