Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

More and more qualified people are moving from poor to rich countries to fill vacancies in specialist areas like engineering, computing and medicine. Some people believe that by encouraging the movement of such people, rich countries are stealing from poor countries v.3

More and more qualified people are moving from poor to rich countries to fill vacancies in specialist areas like engineering, computing and medicine. Some people believe that by encouraging the movement of such people, rich countries are stealing from poor countries v. 3
Students met with higher education qualifications are more likely to have upper levels of positions in their field. In common, most of the companies are willing to hire experienced staff than newcomers. And in poor countries, it’s very hard to get into the upper position in areas like engineering, computing and medicine, due to political influence. Consequently, people come up with a perspective to find jobs overseas, in rich countries. As an initial process of a career, people migrate as students because it helps them to enter the country easily. Then they find minor jobs to survive during their study period. People spend a big sum of money for their studies, which will be a profit for the country they are studying in. Once these people enter the job, some settle in the same country whilst others disrupt their job and return after working for about 5 or 6 years. If these groups of people don’t transfer money, and start investing it in the same country, it will be a profit for the foreign country. Working overseas can be diminished by governments, if suitable procedures are empowered. Increasing the number of items exporting than importing, could have an increase in the job market. The predicament often seen in poor countries are, they do not value their own experts. Consequently, foreign staff are invited to engage in local job requirements where local staff lose job opportunities. According to my aspect, governments in poorer nations are responsible for the people moving overseas for job requirements. And they should accept the citizens as an asset, value them and cherish for the betterment of their own nation.
Students met with higher education qualifications are more likely to have upper levels of positions in their field. In common, most of the
companies
are willing to hire experienced
staff
than newcomers. And in poor
countries
, it’s
very
hard
to
get
into the upper position in areas like engineering, computing and medicine, due to political influence.
Consequently
,
people
come
up with a perspective to find
jobs
overseas, in rich countries.

As an initial process of a career,
people
migrate as students
because
it
helps
them to enter the
country
easily
. Then they find minor
jobs
to survive during their study period.
People
spend a
big
sum of money for their studies, which will be a profit for the
country
they are studying in. Once these
people
enter the
job
,
some
settle in the same
country
whilst others disrupt their
job
and return after working for about 5 or 6 years. If these groups of
people
don’t transfer money, and
start
investing it in the same
country
, it will be a profit for the foreign country.

Working overseas can
be diminished
by
governments
, if suitable procedures
are empowered
. Increasing the number of items exporting than importing, could have an increase in the
job
market. The predicament
often
seen
in poor
countries
are, they do not value their
own
experts.
Consequently
, foreign staff
are invited
to engage in local
job
requirements where local staff lose
job
opportunities.

According to my aspect,
governments
in poorer nations are responsible for the
people
moving overseas for
job
requirements. And they should accept the citizens as an asset, value them and cherish for the betterment of their
own
nation.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
One language sets you in a corridor for life. Two languages open every door along the way.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay More and more qualified people are moving from poor to rich countries to fill vacancies in specialist areas like engineering, computing and medicine. Some people believe that by encouraging the movement of such people, rich countries are stealing from poor countries v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
273 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts