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More and more qualified people are moving from poor to rich countries to fill vacancies in specialist areas like engineering, computing, and medicine. Some people believe that by encouraging the movement of such people rich countries are stealing from poor countries. Others feel that this is only part of the natural movement of workers around the world. What is your opinion? v.2

More and more qualified people are moving from poor to rich countries to fill vacancies in specialist areas like engineering, computing, and medicine. Some people believe that by encouraging the movement of such people rich countries are stealing from poor countries. Others feel that this is only part of the natural movement of workers around the world. What is your opinion? v. 2
A great number of skilled workers in fields such as engineering, information technology and healthcare are relocating from underdeveloped to developed countries. While some people consider that developed countries are trying to again the human resources from underdeveloped countries, others look at it just the same as a normal transition of labour demand all over the world. In my opinion, I totally agree with the later opinion that this movement happens naturally everywhere. Most talented workers tend to look for a job at corporate headquarters, which are normally based in developed countries in order to elevate all their abilities and move up the corporate ladder. Although almost all giant companies have their representatives or subsidiaries in every country around the world, some functions such as manufacturing or research and development, are seldom established in poor countries besides some common fields like sales and marketing. These fields may not fit with workers’ qualifications and educational background. For example, Apple’s Research and Development Center is based in California, therefore if an IT engineer works in this field, he would need to relocate there. Working in the developed countries also helps talented people earn a salary that they could never dream of earning in their poor country. In the developed countries, there is usually a regulated minimum wage that workers can earn, and the amount could be four or five times higher than in their homeland. There are no circumstances in which employers try to pay them as little as they can. An Indian surgeon who is working in San Jose Hospital could be paid approximately $250, 000 per year, whereas If he works in Mumbai, he might gain only 20 percent of that amount. In conclusion, job relocations from underdeveloped to developed countries happen naturally by the pursuit of skilled workers for more money. Almost all workers with special qualifications are looking for a better position in the corporate ladder or a better working environment where they can show off all their capabilities besides getting the best compensation. Those can be attained in the developed country
A great number of skilled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fields
such as engineering, information technology and healthcare are relocating from underdeveloped to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
consider that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are trying to again the human resources from underdeveloped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, others look at it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
the same as a normal transition of
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
demand all over the world. In my opinion, I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the later opinion that this movement happens
naturally
everywhere.

Most talented
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
tend to look for a job at corporate headquarters, which are
normally
based in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in order to elevate all their abilities and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
up the corporate ladder. Although almost all giant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
have their representatives or subsidiaries in every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
around the world,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
functions such as manufacturing or research and development, are seldom established in poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
besides
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fields
like sales and marketing. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fields
may not fit with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers’
qualifications and educational background.
For example
, Apple’s Research and Development Center
is based
in California,
therefore
if an IT engineer works in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
, he would need to relocate there.

Working in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
talented
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
earn a salary that they could never dream of earning in their poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, there is
usually
a regulated minimum wage that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
can earn, and the amount could be four or five times higher than in their homeland. There are no circumstances in which employers try to pay them as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
as they can. An Indian surgeon who is working in San Jose Hospital could
be paid
approximately $250, 000 per year, whereas If he works in Mumbai, he might gain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
20 percent of that amount.

In conclusion
, job relocations from underdeveloped to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
happen
naturally
by the pursuit of skilled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
for more money. Almost all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
with special qualifications are looking for a better position in the corporate ladder or a better working environment where they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
off all their capabilities
besides
getting the best compensation. Those can
be attained
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
country
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
28Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
The joy of knowing a foreign language is inexpressible. I find it really difficult to express such joy in my mother tongue.
Munia Khan

IELTS essay More and more qualified people are moving from poor to rich countries to fill vacancies in specialist areas like engineering, computing, and medicine. Some people believe that by encouraging the movement of such people rich countries are stealing from poor countries. Others feel that this is only part of the natural movement of workers around the world. What is your opinion? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
343 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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