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More and more prisons are being built to house the world's criminals and many people believe long-term imprisonment is the answer to solving the crime problem. However, others feel that medical and psychological assistance is what is required. Discus v.5

More and more prisons are being built to house the world's criminals and many people believe long-term imprisonment is the answer to solving the crime problem. However, others feel that medical and psychological assistance is what is required. Discus v. 5
Day by day the number of prisons that are being built is increasing. The opinions of people about this situation were divided: some people think that this is good, while others think that they need to pay attention to the psychological state of the criminals and provide them with medical care. On the one hand, life imprisonment of criminals would ensure the safety and security of other citizens and society as a whole. Moreover, no one can guarantee that they will not commit crimes again. In addition, do not forget that many criminals already have a worldview and no talk will help them transform. On the other hand, everyone has the right to a second chance. Having sentenced a person to life imprisonment, the state would have shown injustice towards people. It is also worth noting that many people commit crimes because of mental problems, so it would be better if the state would provide medical assistance to such people. From my point of view, it’s better to give two criminals a second chance and provide them with medical care, as well as with everything they need and help them find a new path in life.
Day by day the number of prisons that are
being built
is increasing. The opinions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about this situation
were divided
:
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that this is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
, while others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that they need to pay attention to the psychological state of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
and provide them with medical care.

On the one hand, life imprisonment of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
would ensure the safety and security of other citizens and society as a whole.
Moreover
, no one can guarantee that they will not commit crimes again.
In addition
, do not forget that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
already have a worldview and no talk will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them transform.

On the other hand
, everyone has the right to a second chance. Having sentenced a person to life imprisonment, the state would have shown injustice towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. It is
also
worth noting that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
commit crimes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of mental problems,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it would be better if the state would provide medical assistance to such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

From my point of view, it’s better to give two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
a second chance and provide them with medical care,
as well
as with everything they need and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them find a new path in life.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay More and more prisons are being built to house the world's criminals and many people believe long-term imprisonment is the answer to solving the crime problem. However, others feel that medical and psychological assistance is what is required. Discus v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
196 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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