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More and more people think that there is no need for printed paper newspapers. To what extend do you agree or disagree. v.3

After some years, people will not anymore face the need of buying books, printed newspapers or magazines, because the online network will be so developed that they could freely be able to read and gather all of the information needed online without paying a penny. I fully agree that in the near future the paper resource of information which is currently the main one, will be replaced by the easier and more convenient online method. Firstly, printed newspapers and books are no longer up-to-date, nowadays. Due to Corona virus, people have been obliged to stay particularly at their homes, which has led to times more people consuming information from online news, rather than from the traditional paper resources. What’s more is that everyone is aware that the information on the internet is more efficient, as well as better represented and organised. For example, you can find whatever you want on the net just with one click of your mouse and it doesn’t depend on which sphere of life your search concerns. Whilst if your newspaper is about horse riding, but you want to check the newest models of cars on the global market, it’s impossible to do so and then you have to buy another newspaper about cars, meaning few dollars more. Secondly, the present’s trend in recycling and acting in a more eco-friendly way will for sure reduce the producing of paper, including both books and newspapers, which, on the other hand, will increase their online version demand. For this reason every kind of paper-delivered information will be replaced by information delivered online through our computers and telephones. For instance, one step further of the eco-friendly people’s mind could be the usage of online students books saved in pdf format, instead of the commonly spread paper books. Not only this, but the fact that almost every school this year is working online, with students attending all of their classes through the network, gives us a clear need for more online information than the paper-delivered. In conclusion, I think that if we take the time machine and go into the far future, we shouldn’t be surprised if we see people using the internet as the only source of information, without any kind of need for buying newspapapers which cost money.
After
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
years,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will not
Make sure that ‘anymore’ is used as an adverb, not as an adjective. Did you mean “any more”?
anymore
face the need of buying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
, printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
or magazines,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
network will be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
developed that they could
freely
be able to read and gather
Consider using “all the”.
all of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
needed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
without paying a penny. I
fully
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that in the near future the paper resource of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
which is
currently
the main one, will
be replaced
by the easier and more convenient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
method.

Firstly
, printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
are no longer up-to-date, nowadays. Due to
The term “Coronavirus” (= disease) is spelled as one word.
Corona virus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
been obliged
to stay
particularly
at their homes, which has led to times more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
news,
rather
than from the traditional paper resources. What’s more is that everyone is aware that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
on the internet is more efficient,
as well
as better represented and
Possible spelling mistake. ‘organised’ is British English.
organised
.
For example
, you can find whatever you want on the net
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
with one click of your
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
mouse and
it doesn’t depend on which sphere of life your search concerns. Whilst if your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
is about horse riding,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
you want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
the newest models of cars on the global market, it’s impossible to do
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
so and
then you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
about cars, meaning few dollars more.

Secondly
, the present’s trend in recycling and acting in a more eco-friendly way will for sure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the producing of paper, including both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
, which,
on the other hand
, will increase their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
version demand.
For this reason
every kind of paper-delivered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
will
be replaced
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
delivered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
through our computers and telephones.
For instance
, one step
further
of the eco-friendly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
mind could be the usage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
saved in
Possible spelling mistake found.
pdf
format,
instead
of the
commonly
spread paper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
this,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the fact that almost every school this year is working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
, with students attending all of their classes through the network, gives us a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
need for more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
than the paper-delivered.

In conclusion
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that if we take the time machine and go into the far future, we shouldn’t
be surprised
if we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
using the internet as the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
source of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
, without any kind of need for buying
Possible spelling mistake found.
newspapapers
which cost money.
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IELTS essay In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. with this statement?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
380 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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