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More and more businesses, as well as individuals, are choosing to communicate either professionally or socially using technology rather than being face to face. v.6

More and more businesses, as well as individuals, are choosing to communicate either professionally or socially using technology rather than being face to face. v. 6
Technology is permeating every aspect of human lives. This is apparent in the way in which both individuals and corporations are increasingly using technology to communicate rather than relying on the conventional face to face interactions. The advantages and disadvantages of this development will be analysed in this essay. On the one hand, many argue that technology has abolished the barriers among people and organisations. The most popular depiction cited for this is the shrinkage of time it took to communicate information from one party to another. For instance, Apple offers round the clock online customer services to its customers and potential customers, which enables their sales representatives to instantly respond to the questions posed by consumers. As a result, Apple’s customer service is well renowned for its promptness and quality of service. Hence, it is argued that online communication contributes positively to build harmonious relations between businesses and end-users. On the other hand, many contend that communication through technology has a quality of becoming an addiction to the users to the point where it consumes most of their time. For example, a recent survey by Reddit found that an average American spends around 5 hours a day on websites like Facebook and Twitter. Consequently, a large part of an individual’s day, which would be perhaps better spent on productive activities, is wasted. Thus, the negative aspects of disseminating information through such modern means are clear. After musing upon both the benefits and drawbacks of communication through the internet, it is felt that the merits of this trend outweigh its demerits. It is hoped that technology will continue playing its part in the betterment of the world.
Technology
is permeating every aspect of human
lives
. This is apparent in the way in which both individuals and corporations are
increasingly
using
technology
to communicate
rather
than relying on the conventional face to face interactions. The advantages and disadvantages of this development will be
analysed
in this essay.

On the one hand,
many
argue that
technology
has abolished the barriers among
people
and
organisations
. The most popular depiction cited for this is the shrinkage of time it took to communicate information from one party to another.
For instance
, Apple offers round the clock online
customer
services to its
customers
and potential
customers
, which enables their sales representatives to
instantly
respond to the questions posed by consumers.
As a result
, Apple’s
customer
service is well renowned for its promptness and quality of service.
Hence
, it
is argued
that online communication contributes
positively
to build harmonious relations between businesses and
end
-users.

On the other hand
,
many
contend that communication through
technology
has a quality of becoming an addiction to the users to the point where it consumes most of their time.
For example
, a recent survey by Reddit found that an average American spends around 5 hours a day on websites like Facebook and Twitter.
Consequently
, a large part of an individual’s day, which would be perhaps better spent on productive activities,
is wasted
.
Thus
, the
negative
aspects of disseminating information through such modern means are
clear
.

After musing upon both the benefits and drawbacks of communication through the internet, it
is felt
that the merits of this trend outweigh its demerits. It
is hoped
that
technology
will continue playing its part in the betterment of the world.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay More and more businesses, as well as individuals, are choosing to communicate either professionally or socially using technology rather than being face to face. v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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