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“Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has a negative effect on their social lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree? ” v.1

“Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has a negative effect on their social lives. ” v. 1
The use of various technological advances in everyday life has certainly had an enormous impact on people’s way of socializing. Our century is a century of information, it is everywhere: cafes, shops, gyms, hospitals etc. Every source tries to show what exactly they want for people to see. This change could be considered somewhat valuable rather than useless. There has certainly been created an excellent opportunity to contribute to a virtual social life. Holders of social network accounts may immediately leave comments on their friends’ statutes and uploaded pictures. Moreover, Facetime, What’sApp or other software alike allow us to get enlightened with the remote areas of the world where our currently reside. These modern forms are updated so that people can send out voice messages, pictures, emojis making the content of the conversation more interesting. For example, in my case, I have some foreign friends who I still keep contact with through messengers. As a result, my social circle is bigger and I can broad my mind by chatting with others come from other countries. In the past this was not possible and I might have communicated with some of these friends only once or twice a year. The next crucial fact factor concerns safety and family matters. Since virtual communication normally occurs in the office or at home, the risk of running into trouble is reduced to the minimum. Family members do not have to be anxious about the whereabouts of their relatives. Therefore, they are highly unlikely to raise the alarm if the recent arranged a face-to-face meeting and can not make it home earlier. For example, I with my family downloaded an app, that helps us to see our locations anytime we like, it is very convenient to stay in touch with each other. Even though technologies have reached the highest points of safety there are still many flaws. Despite the obvious value of up-to-date means of communication, the following negative factors are worth mentoring. Never have human beings been so cautious to see a friend in person as long as a technical option exists. Trying to save time, they tend to develop a fairly heavy reliance on technology. People, especially young generation spend a considerable amount of time online, chatting and on social media. Even though, this might be beneficial to some extent, it is not certainly the same as the real interaction with human beings, as it does not involve the same communication skills. Young children can be seen sitting at the table in a cafe and being totally absorbed in their smartphones instead of carrying on a conversation. To summarise, today’s forms of human interaction may cause some disadvantages especially to social aspects. But otherwise, It is impossible to ignore the positive influence of technology on human communication. When the issue of virtual socialization arises, its convenience and quickness definitely outweigh the laziness and dependence it may bring about.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of various technological advances in everyday life has
certainly
had an enormous impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
way of socializing. Our century is a century of information, it is everywhere:
'cafes' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "cafés"
cafes
, shops, gyms, hospitals etc. Every source tries to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
what exactly they want for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
could
be considered
somewhat valuable
rather
than useless.

There has
certainly
been created
an excellent opportunity to contribute to a virtual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
life. Holders of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
network accounts may immediately
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
comments on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends’
statutes and uploaded pictures.
Moreover
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Facetime
, What’
Possible spelling mistake found.
sApp
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
software alike
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
us to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
enlightened with the remote areas of the world where our
currently
reside. These modern forms
are updated
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
out voice messages, pictures, emojis making the content of the conversation more interesting.
For example
, in my case, I have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
who I
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
contact with through messengers.
As a result
, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
circle is bigger and I
The word 'broad' is a noun or an adjective. A verb or adverb is missing or misspelled here, or maybe a comma is missing.
can broad
my mind by chatting with others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
countries. In the past this was not possible and I might have communicated with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
once or twice a year.

The
next
crucial fact factor concerns safety and family matters. Since virtual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
normally
occurs in the office or at home, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of running into trouble is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
to the minimum. Family members do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be anxious about the whereabouts of their relatives.
Therefore
, they are
highly
unlikely to raise the alarm if the recent arranged a face-to-face meeting and can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it home earlier.
For example
, I with my family downloaded an app, that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
us to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
our locations anytime we like, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
convenient to stay in touch with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
“Even though” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Even though
technologies have reached the highest points of safety there are
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
flaws.

Despite the obvious value of up-to-date means of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
, the following
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
factors are worth mentoring. Never have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
cautious to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
in person as long as a technical option exists. Trying to save time, they tend to develop a
fairly
heavy reliance on technology.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
,
especially
young generation spend a considerable amount of time online, chatting and on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
media.
Even though
, this might be beneficial to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent, it is not
certainly
the same as the real interaction with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings, as it does not involve the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. Young children can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
sitting at the table in a
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
and being
totally
absorbed in their smartphones
instead
of carrying on a conversation.

To
Possible spelling mistake. 'summarise' is British English.
summarise
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s forms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
interaction may cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages
especially
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
aspects.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
otherwise
, It is impossible to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
influence of technology on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
. When the issue of virtual socialization arises, its convenience and quickness definitely outweigh the laziness and dependence it may bring about.
17Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay “Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has a negative effect on their social lives. ” v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
485 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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