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Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has had a negative effect on their social lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.4

Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has had a negative effect on their social lives. v. 4
In the modern world the number of social networks has grown significantly, thereby reducing the amount of time that we spend with our friends in real life. I partly agree with this opinion and I think that it has a negative and a positive impact on our lives. First of all, I believe that communication such as messaging or email don't allow to us to spend more time in real life. Even if people know and trust each other, they should see themselves because of our nature. Human is a social creature and he needs to know how to behave yourself in the society. For example, a lot of people do not talk to each other in real life and as a result, they start to be depressed due to lack of speaking and seeing people in real life. That's why I think it is important sometimes to be more social. On the other hand, the messaging is a great opportunity to talk with people who are far from us. Most of us have relatives and friends in other countries and we want to keep in touch with them via social networks. For instance, my parents live in another city while I study at the university and we can talk just by using our phones. Although we do not see each other, it is a forced measure. In conclusion, I believe that people should opt to talk more in real life, but I can't deny the great options of using messaging in terms of talking in the distance.
In the modern world the number of social networks has grown
significantly
, thereby reducing the amount of time that we spend with our friends in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. I partly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
and a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, I believe that communication such as messaging or email don't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
to us to spend more time in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. Even if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
know and trust each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
, they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
themselves
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of our nature. Human is a social
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
creature and
he needs to know how to behave yourself in the society.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talk
to each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and
as a result
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to
be depressed
due to lack of speaking and seeing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. That's why I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
to be more social.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, the messaging is a great opportunity to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talk
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are far from us. Most of us have relatives and friends in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
countries and
we want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
in touch with them via social networks.
For instance
, my parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in another city while I study at the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
university and
we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talk
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
by using our phones. Although we do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
, it is a forced measure.

In conclusion
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should opt to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talk
more in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I can't deny the great options of using messaging in terms of talking in the distance.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has had a negative effect on their social lives. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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