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Modern communications mean that it’s no longer necessary to write letters. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? v.15

Modern communications mean that it’s no longer necessary to write letters. with this statement? v. 15
In a recent few decades, we have witnessed the dramatic development of information technology and the way of communication has also been drastically changed. Given this situation, some people would think that it is no longer necessary for us to write letters. Generally, I agree with this idea; we can exchange our messages by utilizing a variety of devices and the opportunity to use fountain pens has been decreased. However, I suppose that letters are still necessary in some cases. In the following analysis, I would like to reason and provide some evidence to support my position. Nowadays, smartphone and computers have become crucial devices for our daily life. I suppose that many people think that they would not be able to survive without them. Recently, we can communicate with each other by using these devices, and many people are connected through social networking service (SNS). For instance, I can keep in touch with friends living in foreign countries and I enjoy sending birthday wishes to them by using Facebook. On the other hand, because it takes a long time for us to communicate via letters, I do not write a letter for a decade. Considering this, I think that letters do not play an important role in today’s society. However, I strongly believe that letters will not (and should not) disappear. The main reason is that not all people can utilize the abovementioned devices. For example, my grandfather, who is a kind of “technophobia”, does not like to use a smartphone and he often writes letters to my family. I have to admit that he is outdated; however, I strongly believe that we should not deprive these people of the communication tool. In addition, a research implemented in Japan has shown that about half of elderly people do not understand how to use the Internet. This fact implicates that it is impossible for us to eradicate letters. This is why I would like to state that letters are still necessary. In a nutshell, the way of communication has changed and letters are not necessary especially for the young generation. However, we should not forget that some people are really poor at using new technology. I hope that societies are tolerant to these people.
In a recent few decades, we have witnessed the dramatic development of information technology and the way of communication has
also
been
drastically
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Given
this situation,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is no longer necessary for us to write
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
.
Generally
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
; we can exchange our messages by utilizing a variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
and the opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
fountain pens has
been decreased
.
However
, I suppose that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
are
still
necessary in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases. In the following analysis, I would like to reason and provide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
evidence to support my position.

Nowadays, smartphone and computers have become crucial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
for our daily life. I suppose that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that they would not be able to survive without them. Recently, we can communicate with each other by using these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are connected
through social networking service (SNS).
For instance
, I can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
in touch with friends living in foreign countries and I enjoy sending birthday wishes to them by using Facebook.
On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it takes a long time for us to communicate via
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
, I do not write a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letter
for a decade. Considering this, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
do not play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s society.

However
, I
strongly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
will not (and should not) disappear. The main reason is that not all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can utilize the
Possible spelling mistake found.
abovementioned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
.
For example
, my grandfather, who is a kind of “
Possible spelling mistake found.
technophobia
”, does not like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
a
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
smartphone and
he
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
writes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
to my family. I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
admit that he
is outdated
;
however
, I
strongly
believe that we should not deprive these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of the communication tool.
In addition
,
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "research".
a research
implemented in Japan has shown that about half of elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not understand how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the Internet. This fact implicates that it is impossible for us to eradicate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
. This is why I would like to state that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
are
still
necessary.

In a nutshell, the way of communication has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
are not necessary
especially
for the young generation.
However
, we should not forget that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
really
poor at using new technology. I hope that societies are tolerant to these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Modern communications mean that it’s no longer necessary to write letters. with this statement? v. 15

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
374 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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