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Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. Why do so many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem? v.8

People these days tend to suffer from various health issues since they usually do not exercise enough, whether on a working day or in their leisure time. This essay will discuss the main causes to this problem including extended working hours and being ignorant about one’s health. This essay will also suggest solutions including restricted working hours and conducting awareness campaigns around healthy lifestyles. Working overtime and not paying attention to one’s health are the main reasons people do not put a lot of effort towards exercising. With the onset of COVID recently, most of the employees are working from home, therefore, companies are expecting them to work for longer hours. Thus, people get tired by the end of the day and start ignoring their health. Even on the weekends they tend to ignore the fact that they have to exercise and take care of their health. Therefore, longer working hours and ignorance are the two causes why people do not get time to workout. There are two solutions to this problem, namely restricted working hours through government regulations and conducting awareness campaigns focussing on the need for exercising. Government could pose restriction on the daily working hours, for instance, no individual is allowed to work for more than eight hours a day. Additionally, social organisations should conduct campaigns promoting positive impact of exercising on health. Thus, limiting the time one can spend working in a day and sensitising the public with the benefits of exercising can help solve this problem. Individuals tend to suffer from various health problems since they do not get enough time to exercise. This essay discussed some causes to this issue including stretched working hours and ignorant attitude of people towards exercising. This essay also suggested certain solutions to this problem including government’s contribution to restricting working hours per day and conducting awareness workshops about healthy lifestyles.
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People
these days tend to suffer from various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
issues since they
usually
do not exercise
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
, whether on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
day or in their leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
will discuss the main causes to this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
including extended
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
and being ignorant about one’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
will
also
suggest solutions including restricted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
and conducting awareness campaigns around healthy lifestyles.

Working overtime and not paying attention to one’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
are the main reasons
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not put
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
effort towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercising
. With the onset of
Did you mean “COVID-19” or the alternative spelling “Covid-19” (= coronavirus)?
COVID
recently, most of the employees are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
from home,
therefore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
are expecting them to work for longer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
tired by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the day and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
ignoring their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
. Even on the weekends they tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
the fact that they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
exercise and take care of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
Therefore
, longer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
and ignorance are the two causes why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
The verb “work out” is spelled as two words. The noun ‘workout’ is spelled as one.
workout
.

There are two solutions to this
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problem
,
namely
restricted
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working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
through
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
regulations and conducting awareness campaigns focussing on the need for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercising
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
could pose restriction on the daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
,
for instance
, no individual is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to work for more than eight
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
a day.
Additionally
, social
Possible spelling mistake. ‘organisations’ is British English.
organisations
should conduct campaigns promoting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercising
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
Thus
, limiting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
one can spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in a day and
Possible spelling mistake. ‘sensitising’ is British English.
sensitising
the public with the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercising
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
solve this problem.

Individuals tend to suffer from various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
since they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to exercise. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
discussed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
causes to this issue including stretched
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
and ignorant attitude of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercising
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
also
suggested certain solutions to this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
including
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
’s contribution to restricting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
per day and conducting awareness workshops about healthy lifestyles.
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IELTS essay Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. Why do so many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
312 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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