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Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time and have health problems as a result. Why do many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem? v.12

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time and have health problems as a result. Why do many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem? v. 12
Over the year, WORKING PEOPLE ARE facing many health diseases because of having less physical exercise. This essay will state the reason of not getting enough exercise and the solution of this problem. Exercise is a key way to be fit and refresh a person’s mind and body. Without getting any exercise can cause several health problems. One of the first reason behind this is competitive working hours, too much work load lead to get no time for exercise. For example, not having exercise as a result of diabetes, obesity can be seen among people. To solve this issue companies might be taken a daily compulsory walking habit. Every day employees will be bound to take a walk around the office and off period will be used for doing some physical exercise. In the gym some free classes could be added to influence people to do some exercise Discount method for each individual could be created, like if a gym member can bring another person at the gym will get a half percent discount of full time membership in the gym. A counselling class might be helpful to encourage people to come to the gym and get fit. Secondly, A gym could be established inside each working place, so employees can take some exercise to make your mind and body fresh. Thirdly, A healthy diet plan might be a good solution for working people lead a disease free healthy life. However, A systemic routine life could be taken by each individual to get rid of many health issues like obesity. In conclusion, Having exercise during working day could reduce people's health problems and could ensure a long time healthy life.
Over the year,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
WORKING
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PEOPLE
ARE facing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
diseases
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of having less physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
. This essay will state the reason of not getting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
and the solution of this problem.

Exercise is a key way to
be fit
and refresh a person’s mind and body. Without getting any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
can cause several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
problems. One of the
first
reason behind this is competitive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
hours, too much work load lead to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
no time for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
.
For example
, not having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
as a result
of diabetes, obesity can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. To solve this issue
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
might
be taken
a daily compulsory walking habit. Every day employees will
be bound
to take a walk around the office and off period will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
. In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gym
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
free classes could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
to influence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
Discount method for each individual could
be created
, like if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gym
member can bring another person at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gym
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a half percent discount of full time membership in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gym
. A counselling
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
might be helpful to encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gym
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
fit.
Secondly
, A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gym
could
be established
inside each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
place,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
employees can take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
your mind and body fresh.
Thirdly
, A healthy diet plan might be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
solution for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
lead a disease free healthy life.
However
, A systemic routine life could
be taken
by each individual to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
issues like obesity.

In conclusion
, Having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
day could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
problems and could ensure a long time healthy life.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
29Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time and have health problems as a result. Why do many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem? v. 12

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
280 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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