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Some people think that the increasing use of computers and mobile phones nowadays has unwanted effects on young people’s reading and writing skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree. v.1

Some people think that the increasing use of computers and mobile phones nowadays has unwanted effects on young people’s reading and writing skills. v. 1
Undeniably, technology is gaining momentum in every walk of our life and it is impossible to imagine a life without it. Some folks believe that the overuse of electronic gadgets like computers or mobile phones has adverse effect on the reading and writing skills of the youngsters. In my opinion, I partially agree with this view as technology is a two edge sword having both merits and demerits. To embark with, most of the young people spend more time on their smartphones and laptops. The easy access of internet on these devices allows young people to explore the plethora of content to read which significantly helps them to develop strong vocabulary and broaden their horizons of knowledge. For example, a study of the linguistic department of Oxford university has proved that people developed a good range of vocabulary by reading various articles or blogs online. Apart from this the availability of the dictionary apps are particularly helpful for finding the origin and pronunciation of the words. Thus, the usage of smart gadgets blesses youngsters to ameliorate their reading and linguistic skills. On the other hand, most word processing softwares have spell check features. Since these softwares automatically correct the spelling of misspelled words. Thus, young people lack in remembering the spellings of the common words. In addition to this, the overuse of lingo and smileys in text messaging for faster communication has adversely affected the writing skills of the young people. They find it difficult to write grammatically correct sentence while writing a text. Therefore, the use of electronic devices drastically impact the writing skills of the young people. In conclusion, modern devices like mobile phones or computers have positive and negative aspects in equal measures. It is up to us to decide whether we want to benefit from them or allow them to destroy our cognitive skills.
Undeniably
, technology is gaining momentum in every walk of our life and it is impossible to imagine a life without it.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
folks believe that the overuse of electronic gadgets like computers or mobile phones has adverse effect on the reading and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
of the youngsters. In my opinion, I
partially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this view as technology is a two edge sword having both merits and demerits.

To embark with, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
spend more time on their smartphones and laptops. The easy access of internet on these devices
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to explore the plethora of content to read which
significantly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to develop strong vocabulary and broaden their horizons of knowledge.
For example
, a study of the linguistic department of Oxford university has proved that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
developed a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
range of vocabulary by reading various articles or blogs online. Apart from this the availability of the dictionary apps are
particularly
helpful for finding the origin and pronunciation of the words.
Thus
, the usage of smart gadgets blesses youngsters to ameliorate their reading and linguistic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

On the other hand
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
word
processing
Possible spelling mistake found.
softwares have
Use past participle here: "spelled", "spelt".
spell
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
features.
“Since” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Since
these
Possible spelling mistake found.
softwares
automatically
correct the spelling of misspelled words.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
lack in remembering the spellings of the common words.
In addition
to this, the overuse of lingo and smileys in text messaging for faster communication has
adversely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. They find it difficult to write
grammatically
correct sentence while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
a text.
Therefore
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of electronic devices
drastically
impact the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

In conclusion
, modern devices like mobile phones or computers have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspects in equal measures. It is up to us to decide whether we want to benefit from them or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
our cognitive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that the increasing use of computers and mobile phones nowadays has unwanted effects on young people’s reading and writing skills. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
308 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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