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Many students have to study subjects they do not like. Some people think this is a complete waste of time. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? v.1

Many students have to study subjects they do not like. Some people think this is a complete waste of time. with this statement? v. 1
Education is considered as passport to success and every country dream that their youth must have better education. Recently, international exchange visits have been introduced into the education system. As like me, many are considering it as a good initiative, but opponents have distinct viewpoint. In an essay I will throw light on both perspectives. The defender of the stance that going for overseas visits during high school studies will bring numerous merits for the society believe that it is good castling. The significant reason behind this notion is that pupils learn many those skills which they do not learn in their own country. For example, in my home country India, every material of study is provided by the teacher, and student puts less effort to brief study material from a long chapter, and this may build laziness with them and they might not develop highly recommended skills of research. Despite the fact, in many developed nations this progression is not followed, and this makes pupils more active learner. However, every coin has two sides and the same is true here. The far most important drawback of these visits is that teenage period is the most critical period of one’s life, which required close monitoring of parents. Hence, if students will not be monitored by their parents, they might involve in anti-social activities, and this may destroy their future. Further, these contrary consequences may affect parents negatively. Another pivotal aspect is, orientation of international exchange visits may cause extra burden of poor parents as many times they cannot afford international trips, which can deteriorate their family relation, especially with their offspring’s. To conclude, it cannot be denied that these international travels while studies have far reaching negative impacts, but these are uncommon. Rather than continuing the disadvantages of this, it will be more beneficial to count the advantages as these can be gained by plentiful pupils.
Education
is considered
as passport to success and every country dream that their youth
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have better education. Recently,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
exchange
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visits
have
been introduced
into the education system. As like me,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
are considering it as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
initiative,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
opponents have distinct viewpoint. In an essay I will throw light on both perspectives.

The defender of the stance that going for overseas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visits
during high school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
will bring numerous merits for the society believe that it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
castling. The significant reason behind this notion is that pupils learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
which they do not learn in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
country.
For example
, in my home country India, every material of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
is provided
by the teacher, and student puts less effort to brief
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
material from a long chapter, and this may build laziness with
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
them and
they might not develop
highly
recommended
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
of research. Despite the fact, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
developed nations this progression is not followed, and this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
pupils more active learner.

However
, every coin has two sides and the same is true here. The far most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
drawback of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visits
is that teenage period is the most critical period of one’s life, which required close monitoring of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
.
Hence
, if students will not
be monitored
by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
, they might involve in anti-social activities, and this may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
their future.
Further
, these contrary consequences may affect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
negatively
. Another pivotal aspect is, orientation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
exchange
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visits
may cause extra burden of poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
times they cannot afford
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
trips, which can deteriorate their family relation,
especially
with their offspring’s.

To conclude
, it cannot
be denied
that these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
travels while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
have
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
far reaching
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
these are uncommon.
Rather
than continuing the disadvantages of this, it will be more beneficial to count the advantages as these can
be gained
by plentiful pupils.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Many students have to study subjects they do not like. Some people think this is a complete waste of time. with this statement? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
316 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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