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Many people today prefer socializing online to that in the local community do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages v.2

Many people today prefer socializing online to that in the local community do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages v. 2
In contemporary time, there is a proliferation of consensus that the Internet has a great contribution to the development of cutting-edge life' s pace. Notwithstanding, some people fear that face-to-face communication in the scope of the local neighborhood has been fleeing by social networking while others argue that online chats have tremendously merits to enlarge the circle of friends. I am biased towards the former opinion and the following essay will be analyzed in both views in depth. Initially, it is essential to recognize that online social networking plays a significant role when breaking through the barrier of language, culture and geographical distance via international relation all around the world. To be more specific, the geographical barrier took its toll on the number and scope of friends individual can make, which means that the international relation was made only in the proximity in which we live and work. Therefore, the diversity of the relationship was restricted in the forefather. By way of illustration, based on the wide range of social networking such as Facebook, Snapchat and Instagram that people are able to build business connections like shopping online or interact with idols via live stream. On the flip side, it is equally pivotal to acknowledge that the shortcoming of online socialization can also not be underestimated and the potential risk of being a victim of cybercrime obviously stand out. This means the personal information will be assembled and attended to blackmail aim by the hackers. Moreover, in daily communicate that people tend to aesthetic and the smartphone will become an integral part of their life, especially teenager generation. Fortunately, this hazard is able to easily avoided if users fine-tune rational. Beyond any doubt, it is obvious that online social networking as a positive contributor to the interpersonal relationship. Besides, I hope that users should carefully check the information prior to the update and will have deliberation about the time-consuming for Facebook in the long run.
In contemporary time, there is a proliferation of consensus that the Internet has a great contribution to the development of cutting-edge
life&
#039; s pace. Notwithstanding,
some
people
fear that face-to-face communication in the scope of the local neighborhood has been fleeing by
social
networking while others argue that
online
chats have
tremendously
merits to enlarge the circle of friends. I
am biased
towards the former opinion and the following essay will
be analyzed
in both views in depth.

Initially
, it is essential to recognize that
online
social
networking plays a significant role when breaking through the barrier of language, culture and geographical distance via international relation all around the world. To be more specific, the geographical barrier took its toll on the number and scope of friends individual can
make
, which means that the international relation
was made
only
in the proximity in which we
live
and work.
Therefore
, the diversity of the relationship
was restricted
in the forefather. By way of illustration, based on the wide range of
social
networking such as Facebook, Snapchat and Instagram that
people
are able to build business connections like shopping
online
or interact with idols via
live
stream.

On the flip side, it is
equally
pivotal to acknowledge that the shortcoming of
online
socialization can
also
not
be underestimated
and the potential
risk
of being a victim of cybercrime
obviously
stand out. This means the personal information will
be assembled
and attended to blackmail aim by the hackers.
Moreover
, in daily communicate that
people
tend to aesthetic and the smartphone will become an integral part of their life,
especially
teenager
generation.
Fortunately
, this hazard is able to
easily
avoided if users fine-tune rational.

Beyond any doubt, it is obvious that
online
social
networking as a
positive
contributor to the interpersonal relationship.
Besides
, I hope that users should
carefully
check
the information prior to the update and will have deliberation about the time-consuming for Facebook in the long run.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
One language sets you in a corridor for life. Two languages open every door along the way.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Many people today prefer socializing online to that in the local community do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
325 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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