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Many people think that the media should show more stories which report good news. To what extend do you agree or disagree v.1

Many people think that the media should show more stories which report good news. v. 1
There is a general myth that to succeed in the intercontinental society, the common language is necessary. Many people believe that to promote globalization all the countries should have a global language. However, few people advocate that it may have a negative impact on the local dialects. This essay will discuss both the views in detail before giving my final verdict on this topic. Firstly, with the introduction of a global language, the local dialects which are on the verge of being obsolete, may soon become extinct. In such a scenario, all the literature and historical artefacts, written in that language will lose their importance. However, in most of the countries, the government is introducing new schemes to promote the local dialects. For example, in India, the government in South Indian states has included their native language in their school curriculum. Hence, even though English is the mode of communication in schools, importance is given to state specific languages. On the other hand, common language among nations may help in promoting international trade and in sharing human resources. In addition to it, it will enable all the intellectual people to document their knowledge in a single language unlike today, where the translation of the knowledge base in nation specific language is required. For instance, poetries written by the famous Tamil poet Thiruvalluvar, has been translated into English, for people of other nations. All these efforts can be eradicated if a common language is used across nations. To conclude, I opine that having a common language may help in the expansion of international trade and in building a rational workforce. Therefore, it is clear that it has a more positive influence on the society.
There is a general myth that to succeed in the intercontinental society, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
is necessary.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that to promote globalization all the countries should have a global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
.
However
, few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
advocate that it may have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on the local dialects. This essay will discuss both the views in detail
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
giving my final verdict on this topic.

Firstly
, with the introduction of a global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
, the local dialects which are on the verge of being obsolete, may
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
become extinct. In such a scenario, all the literature and historical
Possible spelling mistake. 'artefacts' is British English.
artefacts
, written in that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
will lose their importance.
However
, in most of the countries, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
is introducing new schemes to promote the local dialects.
For example
, in India, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
in South Indian states has included their native
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
in their school curriculum.
Hence
,
even though
English is the mode of communication in schools, importance is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to state specific languages.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
among nations may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in promoting international trade and in sharing human resources.
In addition
to it, it will enable all the intellectual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to document their knowledge in a single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
unlike
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
, where the translation of the knowledge base in nation specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
is required
.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
poetries
written by the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
Tamil poet
Possible spelling mistake found.
Thiruvalluvar
, has
been translated
into English, for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of other nations. All these efforts can
be eradicated
if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
across nations.

To conclude
, I opine that having a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in the expansion of international trade and in building a rational workforce.
Therefore
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that it has a more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
influence on the society.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people think that the media should show more stories which report good news. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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