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Many people these days are now living alone. Is this a positive or a negative development? v.1

Many people these days are now living alone. Is this a positive or a negative development? v. 1
Across the modern world, many individuals prefer to live alone without anyone. In my opinion, this is negative development which can lead to isolation, potentially harmful situations, as well as problems that will arise in the future. Firstly, one serious problem which can arise from living alone is its isolation. Before this lifestyle, people would often meet family members or friends, for instance, in the kitchen or hall, whereas now individuals prefer to stay at home alone. As a result, people are starting to waste the majority of their time alone at home in their room without meeting other people. Kind of this isolation is not healthy, moreover, it can lead to depression and other issues. Secondly, live alone at home can gain many dangerous problems. In other words, individuals tend to have a chance to gain risky issues as unexpected situations with health. This is particularly concerning for people who have health problems. Furthermore, as this will happen in a house where people are alone, nobody would not have any way to save their life. Finally, individuals will have difficult problems with creating own family in the future. In addiction, this situation is currently critical for many people. They would not be able to understand how is important to hear the children's laugh.
Across the modern world,
many
individuals
prefer to
live
alone
without anyone. In my opinion, this is
negative
development which can lead to isolation,
potentially
harmful situations,
as well
as
problems
that will arise in the future.

Firstly
, one serious
problem
which can arise from living
alone
is its isolation.
Before
this lifestyle,
people
would
often
meet
family members or friends,
for instance
, in the kitchen or hall, whereas
now
individuals
prefer to stay at home
alone
.
As a result
,
people
are starting to waste the majority of their time
alone
at home in their room without meeting other
people
. Kind of this isolation is not healthy,
moreover
, it can lead to depression and other issues.

Secondly
,
live
alone
at home can gain
many
dangerous
problems
.
In other words
,
individuals
tend to have a chance to gain risky issues as unexpected situations with health. This is
particularly
concerning for
people
who have health
problems
.
Furthermore
, as this will happen in a
house
where
people
are
alone
, nobody would not have any way to save their
life
.

Finally
,
individuals
will have difficult
problems
with creating
own
family in the future. In addiction, this situation is
currently
critical for
many
people
. They would not be able to understand how is
important
to hear the children's laugh.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people these days are now living alone. Is this a positive or a negative development? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
214 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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