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Many people support use of animals for testing medicines for humans. Others believe it isn’t appropriate to use animals for such experiments. Discuss both views v.7

Many people support use of animals for testing medicines for humans. Others believe it isn’t appropriate to use animals for such experiments. 7
The medical sector had been developing since the early 1900s. Every day researchers discover new types of diseases. Then, researchers will start to find the cure of the diseases by doing many experiments. All of these experiments are tested on animals. Many people do agree with this statement. In the past year animals have helped humans to recover from many chronic diseases like SARS, etc. Researchers cannot release new drugs to the market without even proving whether it is safe to humans. Moreover, this untested drug can create a new disease. Which can be very lethal to the public. Many people can lose their lives. In addition, animals are very similar to humans in many ways. However, many people believe that harming animals are morally wrong. Why should animals suffer their life for humans needy because mostly all the viruses and diseases are spreading by human errors. Furthermore, every life forms have the rights to live their life. This could lead to the extinction of the animal species. Government can develop alternative methods to test the medicines. For example, in this advancing world technology had brought many improvements to different sectors. So, with the help of software, they can invent a human model which contains the human immune system. To sum up, many people believe that animals should not be used for medical research. Humans must find different ways to solve the problems in the medical stream.
The medical sector had been developing since the early 1900s. Every day researchers discover new types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
. Then, researchers will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to find the cure of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
by doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
experiments.

All of these experiments are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tested
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement. In the past year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
to recover from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
chronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
like SARS, etc. Researchers cannot release new drugs to the market without even proving whether it is safe to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
.
Moreover
, this untested drug can create a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
.
“Which” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Which
can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
lethal to the public.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can lose their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
similar to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that harming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are
morally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
. Why should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
suffer their life for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
needy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
mostly
all the viruses and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
are spreading by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
errors.
Furthermore
, every life forms have the rights to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
their life. This could lead to the extinction of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
species.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
can develop alternative methods to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
the medicines.
For example
, in this advancing world technology had brought
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
improvements to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
sectors.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of software, they can invent a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
model which contains the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
immune system.

To sum up,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
should not be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for medical research.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Humans
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
ways to solve the problems in the medical stream.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people support use of animals for testing medicines for humans. Others believe it isn’t appropriate to use animals for such experiments. 7

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
237 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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