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Many people find it hard to balance their work with other parts of their lives. What are the reasons for this? How can this problem be overcome? v. 6

Although such topics, in all likelihood, never will yield a consensual agreement, a constructive dialogue on key to success is decided by own lessons hence life experiences gives a different aspect of knowledge compared to the formal education. My view is that irrespective of numerous arguments that exist on either side, I cannot agree that the life experiences are better without a formal education. Experiences acquired from own life is not worth without a formal education, when it is mandatory for a formal job, but is useful for day-to-day tasks. It is important to note that when formal education is provided, it gives a better insight into different aspects of the daily experiences. For example, while I was constructing my own house the knowledge acquired from my formal education helped me to decide certain scientific aspects of the building. Therefore, the aforementioned discussion shows that a formal education is highly desirable. Another pivotal aspect of the argument is that a degree enhances the possibility to expect a formal job. Although, knowledge gained by ourself can make us ready for a formal job, a professional degree could provide a better understanding of the work that needs to be carried out. For instance, the computer programming that I am doing can be done without a formal education, but certain theories that I have studied in my professional degree helped me to reduce mental stress. In conclusion, this essay discussed why a formal education is highly desirable and how it helps to reduce the work pressure, hence relying on the teachings from own life is less important. The equally potential evidence to support the arguments I have provided, underlines my opinion.

IELTS essay Many people find it hard to balance their work with other parts of their lives. What are the reasons for this? How can this problem be overcome? v.6

Although such topics, in all likelihood,
never will yield
a consensual agreement, a constructive dialogue on key to success
is decided
by
own
lessons
hence
life experiences gives a
different
aspect of knowledge compared to the formal
education
. My view is that irrespective of numerous arguments that exist on either side, I cannot
agree
that the life experiences are better without a formal education. Experiences acquired from
own
life is not worth without a formal
education
, when it is mandatory for a formal job,
but
is useful for day-to-day tasks. It is
important
to note that when formal
education
is provided
, it gives a better insight into
different
aspects of the daily experiences.
For example
, while I was constructing my
own
house
the knowledge acquired from my formal
education
helped
me to decide certain scientific aspects of the building.
Therefore
, the aforementioned discussion
shows
that a formal
education
is
highly
desirable. Another pivotal aspect of the argument is that a degree enhances the possibility to
expect
a formal job. Although, knowledge gained by
ourself
can
make
us ready for a formal job, a professional degree could provide a better understanding of the work that needs to
be carried
out.
For instance
, the computer programming that I am doing can
be done
without a formal
education
,
but
certain theories that I have studied in my professional degree
helped
me to
reduce
mental
stress
.
In conclusion
, this essay discussed why a formal
education
is
highly
desirable and how it
helps
to
reduce
the work pressure,
hence
relying on the teachings from
own
life is less
important
. The
equally
potential evidence to support the arguments I have provided, underlines my opinion.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
52Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
4 paragraphs
278 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resources: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Band score ≥ 7
  • Band score ≤ 6
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