Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Many people buy products that they do not really need and replace old products with new ones unnecessarily. Why do people buy things they do not really need? Do you think this is a good thing? v.1

Many people buy products that they do not really need and replace old products with new ones unnecessarily. Why do people buy things they do not really need? Do you think this is a good thing? v. 1
In today's modern era, new products are launched with blink of eyes either these are gadgets, clothes or kitchen items. However, many people buy these products unnecessarily even if they already have that products in old form. In my opinion, buying new things which are not in need are just a waste of money. This essay will further elaborate the reasons and negative effects of this trend and thus will form a logical conclusion. Analysing the statement the first and foremost reason behind this trend is that the pressure from the peer and society. This trend occurs differently in each category such as youngsters buy new gadgets to show their friends and make a good impression in front of them. Moreover, women buy new products such as clothes, accessories and kitchen equipment to show off their status in front of other women. In addition, men buy new products such as expensive clothes and automobiles to show off their status to their friends and colleagues. Nevertheless, buying new things which are not needed is just a waste of money which also allure others to do the same. Furthermore, buying new gadgets also a waste of money but throwing the old ones not only wither wealth but also harm the environment because the batteries of these appliances produce harmful chemicals which cause pollution in the environment and that further cause diseases and also harm animals when they swallow it. To conclude, buying new substances which are not used harm the nature and also a waste of money. A authorities if take huge steps than this trend can be reduced.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's modern era,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are launched
with blink of eyes either these are gadgets, clothes or kitchen items.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
unnecessarily
even if they already have that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
form. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
things which are not in need are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. This essay will
further
elaborate the reasons and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
and
thus
will form a logical conclusion.

Possible spelling mistake. 'Analysing' is British English.
Analysing
the statement the
first
and foremost reason behind this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
is that the pressure from the peer and society. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
occurs
differently
in each category such as youngsters
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
gadgets to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their friends and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
impression in front of them.
Moreover
, women
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
such as clothes, accessories and kitchen equipment to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
off their status in front of other women.
In addition
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
such as expensive clothes and automobiles to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
off their status to their friends and colleagues.

Nevertheless
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
things which are not needed is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
which
also
allure others to do the same.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
gadgets
also
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
throwing the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
ones not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
wither wealth
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
harm the environment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the batteries of these appliances produce harmful chemicals which cause pollution in the environment and that
further
cause diseases and
also
harm animals when they swallow it.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
substances which are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
harm the nature and
also
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
.
Use "An" instead of 'A' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
A
authorities if take huge steps than this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
.
17Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
33Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people buy products that they do not really need and replace old products with new ones unnecessarily. Why do people buy things they do not really need? Do you think this is a good thing? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts