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Many people believe that used distance learning program to study at home but some people think that it cannot bring the benefit as much as attending the college or university do you agree or disagree. v.1

Many people believe that used distance learning program to study at home but some people think that it cannot bring the benefit as much as attending the college or university v. 1
Nowadays, the world has become a smaller village. Learning by something has become quite popular rather than in the last decade. Many people use distance learning programs to study at their home like as computers, mobile and many more, which is considered by people. However, some individuals claim that use distance learning at home is not a good way. They reckon that attending the college or educational institution is beneficial for the people of rise the knowledge. Therefore, there are many causes why people use these views. The following paragraph will examine the viewpoints and add my specific conclusion. To embark with, those masses who argue that distance learning is helpful for them. The first reason is that it is an inexpensive method for learning. To cite an example, it is a fact that when people join the college or university, they have to pay the costly wages at the places as well as for going to the college and university. For instance, they collect all the information it has become an expensive way, which is not affordable for poor people. As a result, they tend to attend the live classes at their home. Nevertheless, it not only saves the money, but also able to get opportunity spend time with friend and family members at their home. In addition to it, pupils have to come to deal many quandaries during the school times. Likewise, students easily get nervous from the strictest teachers. Owing to this they watch lectures related to studies sitting at their home. They get a chance for watching videos again and again, which is not possible to see the course at college and university, as teachers have no extra time for telling the questions of students. If students miss any class, they never understand it from the teachers. Therefore, people opine that sitting at home for learning is the best plan, which is very beneficial for the learners. On the flip side, those learners ponder that college or university is the supreme plan for learning of learners. Firstly, it helps to enhance the knowledge of learners. To illustrate, college or university is a that place where students get an opportunity to increase the knowledge. Students go to the college library for collecting the information about their education. Last not but least, students not only make the new friends, but also meet teachers who have in depth of knowledge about their subject. When pupils face any difficulty associated with their work or study, they love meeting their teachers. It enhances the communication skill of children, when they talk face to face with teachers, they express to teachers throughout their views. To sum up, even though learning is the very important for every person in life, yet college or university that a place where pupils are able to obtain the information and increase the capability of children. However I deem that learning at college or university is the great method for students.
Nowadays, the world has become a smaller village.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Learning
by something has become quite popular
rather
than in the last decade.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
distance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
programs to study at their home like as computers, mobile and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more, which
is considered
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals claim that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
distance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
at home is not a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way. They reckon that attending the college or educational institution is beneficial for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of rise the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
.
Therefore
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
causes why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
these views. The following paragraph will examine the viewpoints and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
my specific conclusion.

To embark with, those masses who argue that distance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
is helpful for them. The
first
reason is that it is an inexpensive method for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
. To cite an example, it is a fact that when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
the college or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay the costly wages at the places
as well
as for going to the college and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
For instance
, they collect all the information it has become an expensive way, which is not affordable for poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
As a result
, they tend to attend the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
classes at their home.
Nevertheless
, it not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
saves the money,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
opportunity spend time with friend and family members at their home.

In addition
to it, pupils
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to deal
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
quandaries during the school times.
Likewise
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
nervous from the strictest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
. Owing to this they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
lectures related to studies sitting at their home. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a chance for watching videos again and again, which is not possible to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the course at college and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
have no extra time for telling the questions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
miss any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
, they never understand it from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
opine that sitting at home for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
is the best plan, which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
beneficial for the learners.

On the flip side, those learners ponder that college or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
is the supreme plan for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
of learners.
Firstly
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to enhance the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
of learners. To illustrate, college or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
is a that place where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an opportunity to increase the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
go to the college library for collecting the information about their education. Last not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
least,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the new friends,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
who have in depth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
about their subject. When pupils face any difficulty associated with their work or study, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
meeting their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
. It enhances the communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
of children, when they talk face to face with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
, they express to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
throughout their views.

To sum up,
even though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
is the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for every person in life,
yet
college or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
that a place where pupils are able to obtain the information and increase the capability of children.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
I deem that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
at college or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
is the great method for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
21Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
41Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
A new language is a new life.
Persian Proverb

IELTS essay Many people believe that used distance learning program to study at home but some people think that it cannot bring the benefit as much as attending the college or university v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
493 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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