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Many people believe that social networking sites such as Facebook have a huge negative effect on society and individuals. Do you agree or disagree? v.1

Many people believe that social networking sites such as Facebook have a huge negative effect on society and individuals. v. 1
The internet has become a part and parcel of everyone’s life. There are a plethora of social networking sites are available on it. According to a segment of society, social media only leaves a worse impact on human beings profoundly. According to my point of view, it puts both positive and negative impact on persons as well as on society. I will elaborate it in the following paragraphs of this essay. The first and foremost positive influence is that social networking websites connect humans with the entire world. They can share their thoughts and ideas with other persons who perhaps live in another part of the world. In fact, manpower is now able to express their opinions on the different kinds of survey related to controversial issues. Therefore, they are spreading awareness everywhere. Apart from it, through social media, individuals have become able to connect with their friends all the time. In other words, people make profiles on social sites such as Facebook, Instagram, Sharechat, and so on. After it, they upload pictures on it and make new friends. As a result of it, they keep themselves in touch with their near and dear ones. However, the bad effect of a variety of social websites on society and human being is that they are indulging in social media completely. Sometimes, they become addictive to it because social network’s continuous use disconnect masses from the real world. Regularly strive to develop an online personality is lead to the decrement in real life. Moreover, social networking websites play a vital role to make relationship weak between humans. Because all the time, they remain busy with their online friends on Facebook or Instagram. As a result of it, they do not visit the homes of their relatives which decreases the true love of a relationship. Many times, they feel comfortable when they talk to strangers on social media instead of a face-to-face meeting. To conclude, it is rightly said that excess of everything is bad. If someone uses social sites prolong, then it puts a diverse effect on his or her life like weak relationship, health hazards, and so on.
The internet has become a part and parcel of everyone’s life. There are a plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking sites are available on it. According to a segment of society,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
a worse impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings
profoundly
. According to my point of view, it puts both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on persons
as well
as on society. I will elaborate it in the following paragraphs of this essay.

The
first
and foremost
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
influence is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking websites connect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
with the entire world. They can share their thoughts and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
with other persons who perhaps
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in another part of the world. In fact, manpower is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
able to express their opinions on the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of survey related to controversial issues.
Therefore
, they are spreading awareness everywhere. Apart from it, through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
, individuals have become able to connect with their friends all the time.
In other words
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
profiles on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
sites such as Facebook, Instagram,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sharechat
, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. After it, they upload pictures on it and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
new friends.
As a result
of it, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
themselves in touch with their near and dear ones.

However
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
effect of a variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
websites on society and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
being is that they are indulging in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
completely.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
, they become addictive to it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
network’s continuous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
disconnect masses from the real world.
Regularly
strive to develop an online personality is lead to the decrement in real life.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking websites play a vital role to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
relationship weak between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
all the time, they remain busy with their online friends on Facebook or Instagram.
As a result
of it, they do not visit the homes of their relatives which decreases the true
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
of a relationship.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
times, they feel comfortable when they talk to strangers on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
instead
of a face-to-face meeting.

To conclude
, it is
rightly
said that excess of everything is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
. If someone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
sites prolong, then it puts a diverse effect on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
his or her
life like weak relationship, health hazards, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
15Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people believe that social networking sites such as Facebook have a huge negative effect on society and individuals. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
357 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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