Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Many people believe that social networking sites have huge negative effect on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Many people believe that social networking sites have huge negative effect on both individuals and society. v. 1
In the recent modern world, by developing internet technology, social networking becomes a part of daily activities in the person's life. Many people argued that the influence of these networking has a negative effect on both individuals and society. I completely agree with this argument. Social networking like Facebook and Instagram nowadays become popular among people especially the youth. Apart from the only minor benefits which is the communicating with anyone in the world with just a click there are several drawbacks to use social media regularly. The ones who participate the social network activities get addicted to this kind of sites. For example, during office working hours in which staff member should be dedicated in their duties do not hesitate to browse these online sites. Other disadvantages related to social networking like lack of face-to-face interaction between people, which eventually lead to a polarized society. Although children and adult live in the same home, they do not have much direct speech. In addition, devoting most of the time in social networking activities cause to several diseases like depression, obesity, headache, poor vision and so on. Moreover, in order to register at these sites, usually individuals must enter their personal information and beside that most of the members share their personal information which lead to petty crimes like hacking and stalking. In conclusion, however using social networking has both positive and negative effects on individuals and society, in my point of view the adverse effect outweigh positive.
In the recent modern world, by developing internet technology,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking becomes a part of daily activities in the person's life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argued that the influence of these networking has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on both individuals and society. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this argument.

Social networking like Facebook and Instagram nowadays become popular among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
especially
the youth. Apart from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
minor benefits which is the communicating with anyone in the world with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a click there are several drawbacks to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
media
regularly
. The ones who participate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
network activities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
addicted to this kind of sites.
For example
, during office working hours in which staff member should
be dedicated
in their duties do not hesitate to browse these online sites.

Other disadvantages related to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking like lack of face-to-face interaction between
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, which
eventually
lead to a polarized society. Although children and adult
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the same home, they do not have much direct speech.
In addition
, devoting most of the time in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking activities cause to several diseases like depression, obesity, headache, poor vision and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
Moreover
, in order to register at these sites,
usually
individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
enter their personal information and beside that most of the members share their personal information which lead to petty crimes like hacking and stalking.

In conclusion
,
however
using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking has both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects on individuals and society, in my point of view the adverse effect outweigh
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Charlemagne

IELTS essay Many people believe that social networking sites have huge negative effect on both individuals and society. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
247 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts