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Many people believe that inherent talent is more important than practice in many fields like sport or music. According to them great musicians and sportsmen are born and can’t be created. However, others claim that talent has little to do with success and any child can be taught to become a great sports person or musician. v.1

Many people believe that inherent talent is more important than practice in many fields like sport or music. According to them great musicians and sportsmen are born and can’t be created. However, others claim that talent has little to do with success and any child can be taught to become a great sports person or musician. v. 1
It is a frequently debated fact that some people are gifted with some abilities in their genetic, but the others do not have this kind of prodigiousness. By contrast, some people think that any person could be a successful musician or sportsman by education, practice and proper guideline. On the one hand, each individual has a tendency on a specific field of art or a science. However, a minority of them are geniuses who show off a splendid success on their jobs. For instance, most of the investors, such as Einstein, Newton, Edison and Graham bell. They were geniuses and had genetically intellectual capacity much more than the other people. Furthermore, this kind of successful people could be seen in sports and music also. Messi and Mozart are the good examples for achieved sportsman and musician. Thus, some people could be more capable than the others in certain areas. On the other hand, some people think that every child could be a successful person through education. In other words, success is behind the education, continuous practices and working hard. The abilities that people have do not provide a differentiation on the achievements of them. The difference among the people’s success is derived from the quality of education that they got. Thus, any person who were the same position and had a similar education would be able to indicate awesome performance. Finally, each person has different kinds of abilities, skills, talents in different areas. The abilities, skills and tendencies of children detected in early ages and children should get an education in the fields that they have the tendency. Thus, both nurture and nature are effective on the success of people.
It is a
frequently
debated fact that
some
people
are gifted
with
some
abilities
in their genetic,
but
the others do not have this kind of
prodigiousness
. By contrast,
some
people
think
that any
person
could be a successful musician or sportsman by
education
, practice and proper guideline.

On the one hand, each individual has a tendency on a specific field of art or a science.
However
, a minority of them are geniuses who
show
off a splendid
success
on their jobs.
For instance
, most of the investors, such as Einstein, Newton, Edison and Graham bell. They were geniuses and had
genetically
intellectual capacity much more than the
other
people
.
Furthermore
, this kind of successful
people
could be
seen
in sports and music
also
. Messi and Mozart are the
good
examples for achieved sportsman and musician.
Thus
,
some
people
could be more capable than the others in certain areas.

On the
other
hand,
some
people
think
that every child could be a successful
person
through
education
. In
other
words,
success
is behind the
education
, continuous practices and working
hard
. The
abilities
that
people
have
do
not provide a differentiation on the achievements of them. The difference among the
people’s
success
is derived
from the quality of
education
that they
got
.
Thus
, any
person
who were the same position and had a similar
education
would be able to indicate awesome performance.

Finally
, each
person
has
different
kinds of
abilities
,
skills
, talents in
different
areas. The
abilities
,
skills
and tendencies of children detected in early ages and children should
get
an
education
in the fields that they have the tendency.
Thus
, both nurture and nature are effective on the
success
of
people
.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people believe that inherent talent is more important than practice in many fields like sport or music. According to them great musicians and sportsmen are born and can’t be created. However, others claim that talent has little to do with success and any child can be taught to become a great sports person or musician. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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