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Many people believe that inherent talent is more important than practice in many fields like sport or music. According to them great musicians and sportsmen are born and can’t be created. However, others claim that talent has little to do with success and any child can be taught to become a great sports person or musician. v.4

Many people believe that inherent talent is more important than practice in many fields like sport or music. According to them great musicians and sportsmen are born and can’t be created. However, others claim that talent has little to do with success and any child can be taught to become a great sports person or musician. v. 4
In today's modern world, we are constantly bombarded with the idea that those who achieve success in their careers or studies are born with certain talents. Some people, however, are of the opinion that every child can be as talented as them as they assert that children nowadays can be sent to classes to learn the required technique. Thus, we will examine both sides of the arguments before reaching a reasonable conclusion. Admittedly, some people seem to be more talented than others due to the extraordinary achievements they have ever had which then leads to the belief that they are born with a specific talent. They can pick up or learn new things that they have not been exposed to in the certain field, for example, sports or music, much faster than others. It is also believed that parents who have mastered the skills in sports, then their children are more likely to be born with such skills as well. Hence, the children are, normally, able to achieve their aspirations easier than others, in other words, they do not need to work so hard like other people do in order to succeed in their careers or studies. Nevertheless, it does not mean that other people who do not bear with such talents will certainly fail to reach their targets. I believe everyone can be as successful as those who are skilled and talented provided that they are willing to be more dedicated in making attempts to strike their goals. According to the statistic of a recent research conducted in Malaysia, it has shown that about 75% of the people are not born with specific talents but they are still managed to pay extra attentions to their weaknesses and made a change in order to become successful in a certain career. Therefore, it is apparent that although the majority of people worldwide are not born with talents, due to their patience and endurance, they have stricken their targeted goal. In conclusion, I believe that every individual around the globe can still achieve their aspirations regardless of their talents as long as they are willing to pay more hard works than others. Our nation will surely to continue to prosper and flourish in the decades to come if there are more citizens who become successful in their careers.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's modern world, we are
constantly
bombarded with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
achieve success in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
careers
or studies
are born
with certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talents
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
however
, are of the opinion that every child can be as talented as them as they assert that children nowadays can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to classes to learn the required technique.
Thus
, we will examine both sides of the arguments
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
reaching a reasonable conclusion.

Admittedly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
seem to be more talented than others due to the extraordinary achievements they have ever had which then leads to the belief that they
are born
with a specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
. They can pick up or learn new things that they have not
been exposed
to in the certain field,
for example
, sports or music, much faster than others. It is
also
believed that parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have mastered the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in sports, then their children are more likely to
be born
with such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
as well
.
Hence
, the children are,
normally
, able to achieve their aspirations easier than others, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, they do not need to work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do in order to succeed in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
careers
or studies.

Nevertheless
, it does not mean that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
do not bear with such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talents
will
certainly
fail to reach their targets. I believe everyone can be as successful as those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are skilled
and talented provided that they are willing to be more dedicated in making attempts to strike their goals. According to the statistic of a recent research conducted in Malaysia, it has shown that about 75% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not born with specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they are
still
managed to pay extra attentions to their weaknesses and made a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in order to become successful in a certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
.
Therefore
, it is apparent that although the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
worldwide are not born with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talents
, due to their patience and endurance, they have stricken their targeted goal.

In conclusion
, I believe that every individual around the globe can
still
achieve their aspirations regardless of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talents
as long as they are willing to pay more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
works than others. Our nation will
surely
to continue to prosper and flourish in the decades to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
if there are more citizens
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
become successful in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
careers
.
18Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people believe that inherent talent is more important than practice in many fields like sport or music. According to them great musicians and sportsmen are born and can’t be created. However, others claim that talent has little to do with success and any child can be taught to become a great sports person or musician. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
386 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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