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Many people are now spending more and more time travelling to work or school some people believe that this has negative development while others think there are some benefits Discuss both views and give your opinion v.4

Many people are now spending more and more time travelling to work or school some people believe that this has negative development while others think there are some benefits 4
Nowadays, the amount of time that people spend on commuting to work is increasing significantly. While some people think that this trend brings some benefits, I personally opine that this development is severely affecting both individuals and the environment. On the one hand, long-haul travel could be beneficial for residents who cannot afford accommodation near their workplace or schools in big cities. Undoubtedly, living expenses in metropolitan areas are often prohibitively expensive. It is, therefore, more economical for students and working adults with tight budgets to shuttle far distance. To be more specific, the average price of a rented apartment in Ho Chi Minh city is three million dongs, exclusive of other costs, such as meals, electricity bills when they live here. Meanwhile, bus tickets for a 40-kilometre trip from the suburban areas merely cost six thousand dongs. Obviously, they only pay about 350 thousand dongs for travelling cost per month, which is far more reasonable compared to living in the city centres. Therefore, despite longer commuting time, travellers can reap benefits from long-distance trips. However, this trend of travelling negatively affect commuters’ efficiency and substantially contributes to the deterioration of the environment. Firstly, people would have to wake up early in the morning to prepare and then travel an enormous distance to their destinations, costing them a great deal of energy. Additionally, more gas emissions which are the primary cause of air pollution, will be definitely released. To be more specific, according to the Environmental Protection Agency in United States, a typical passenger vehicle emits about 4. 6 metric tons of carbon dioxide per year, and the transportation sector generates the largest share of greenhouse gas emissions. This means that longer-distance trip between work or school to home is likely to devastatingly impact the air quality and people’s health. In conclusion, in spite of several advantages of this development, I believe that it is more detrimental to the environment and people’s productivity.
Nowadays, the amount of time that
people
spend on commuting to work is increasing
significantly
. While
some
people
think
that this trend brings
some
benefits, I
personally
opine that this development is
severely
affecting both individuals and the environment.

On the one hand, long-haul travel could be beneficial for residents who cannot afford accommodation near their workplace or schools in
big
cities.
Undoubtedly
, living expenses in metropolitan areas are
often
prohibitively
expensive. It is,
therefore
, more economical for students and working adults with tight budgets to shuttle far distance. To be more specific, the average price of a rented apartment in
Ho Chi Minh city
is three million dongs, exclusive of other costs, such as meals, electricity bills when they
live
here. Meanwhile, bus tickets for a
40-kilometre
trip from the suburban areas
merely
cost six thousand dongs.
Obviously
, they
only
pay about 350 thousand dongs for travelling cost per month, which is far more reasonable compared to living in the city
centres
.
Therefore
, despite longer commuting time,
travellers
can reap benefits from long-distance trips.

However
, this trend of travelling
negatively
affect commuters’ efficiency and
substantially
contributes to the deterioration of the environment.
Firstly
,
people
would
have to
wake up early in the morning to prepare and then travel an enormous distance to their destinations, costing them a great deal of energy.
Additionally
, more gas emissions which are the primary cause of air pollution, will be definitely released. To be more specific, according to the Environmental Protection Agency
in United States
, a typical passenger vehicle emits about 4. 6 metric tons of carbon dioxide per year, and the transportation sector generates the largest share of greenhouse gas emissions. This means that longer-distance trip between work or school to home is likely to
devastatingly
impact the air quality and
people’s
health.

In conclusion
,
in spite of
several advantages of this development, I believe that it is more detrimental to the environment and
people’s
productivity.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
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IELTS essay Many people are now spending more and more time travelling to work or school some people believe that this has negative development while others think there are some benefits 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
323 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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