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Many museums and historical sites are mostly visited by foreign tourists, but not local people. Why do you think it happens? What can be done to attract local visitors to these sites? v.1

Many museums and historical sites are mostly visited by foreign tourists, but not local people. Why do you think it happens? What can be done to attract local visitors to these sites? v. 1
It is seen that museums and historical places are visited by tourists and local people avoid visiting them. This essay will discuss the reasons for this and suggest a viable solution to encourage native people to visit museums and monuments. To embark on, there are some reasons why local citizens do not visit museums. First and foremost, people find it boring to visit such places. It takes a considerable amount of time to explore these heritage sites and people hardly find anything new. Museums house artefacts and artworks which might not be everyone’s cup of tea. So people feel that it is a waste of time to visit monuments and art galleries. Secondly, many of the museums and historical sites charge an entry fee. If a person visited it once, they would avoid visiting it again because nobody wants to pay again and again to watch the same artworks. For instance, there is a museum in my city named “The Chocolate Room”. It charges a hefty 1000 rupees as entry fee and last month my cousin requested me to visit the museum but I refused due to the fact that I had already visited the museum and I did not want to pay the entry fee again. There are some possible solutions which can attract local people to visit museums and historical buildings. These places depict the history and the culture of our forefathers. So schools can impart knowledge about historical places amongst the students so that they gain interest in and respect for such places. Additionally, traditional museums can be blended with modern museums to give a new experience to the visitors. For example, Madame Tussauds museum houses ancient paintings along with modern wax made statues of well-recognized celebrities. After this fusion, there is a massive rise in the number of local and foreign visitors to the museum. Lastly, scraping the entry fee can also attract native people to revisit the museums and historical buildings. To recapitulate, it is clear that local people avoid visiting museums and historical building because they are out-dated and charge an entry fee. To rekindle locals’ interest, schools can teach students about the importance of such places; authorities must strive to update museums frequently and entry fee can be exempted.
It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
are visited
by tourists and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
avoid visiting them. This essay will discuss the reasons for this and suggest a viable solution to encourage native
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and monuments.

To embark on, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
citizens do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
.
First
and foremost,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
find it boring to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
. It takes a considerable amount of time to explore these heritage sites and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
hardly find anything new.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museums
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
Possible spelling mistake. 'artefacts' is British English.
artefacts
and artworks which might not be everyone’s cup of tea.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel that it is a waste of time to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
monuments and art galleries.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
sites charge an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
. If a person visited it once, they would avoid visiting it again
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
nobody wants to pay again and again to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
the same artworks.
For instance
, there is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
in my city named “The Chocolate Room”. It charges a hefty 1000 rupees as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
and last month my cousin requested me to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I refused due to the fact that I had already visited the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
and I did not want to pay the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
again.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
possible solutions which can attract
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
buildings. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
depict the history and the culture of our forefathers.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
schools can impart knowledge about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
amongst the students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they gain interest in and respect for such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
.
Additionally
, traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
can
be blended
with modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
to give a new experience to the visitors.
For example
, Madame
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tussauds
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
ancient paintings along with modern wax made statues of well-recognized celebrities. After this fusion, there is a massive rise in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
and foreign visitors to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
.
Lastly
, scraping the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
can
also
attract native
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to revisit the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
buildings.

To recapitulate, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
avoid visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
building
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are out-dated and charge an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
. To rekindle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locals’
interest, schools can teach students about the importance of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
; authorities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
strive to update
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
frequently
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
entry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
can
be exempted
.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
60Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Many museums and historical sites are mostly visited by foreign tourists, but not local people. Why do you think it happens? What can be done to attract local visitors to these sites? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
376 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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