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Many high street shops have gone out of business in recent years. Why do you think this has happened? Is it a positive or negative development? v.4

Many high street shops have gone out of business in recent years. Why do you think this has happened? Is it a positive or negative development? v. 4
In previous days, the public can purchase things from local shops, but now It is irrefutable that an undeniable revert recently in all over the world. Minimal high street shops are closed. According to my perspective, it happened due to E-commerce business, although it has mammoth effects, but there are some multifarious advantageous they are outweighed by the drawbacks. First and foremost Since user can purchase any necessity items very easily without going to anywhere by using online. It has countless benefits to those humankind, which couldn't travel to market due busiest life, although it has very cheap, convenient and also offer some discount, to customers some time quality of items should be not effective. So online technique has a bigger picture in modernization era. Pursing this further with an illustration that recently purchased some books on Amazon which are not available in the market shops, but through online it has dispatched within two days if any damage have found out they can also provide returnable facilities. Mostly to start up business required a plethora of money, land and staff etc. So that people give importance to browsing. Even though no doubt it had a remarkable impact to retail shops and masses so Unemployment, face to face communication and physical activity also degrade. Because shopping malls are the corner where families and friends get together. By using shops, user can purchase items accordingly to their satisfaction and needs, but shop retailer can't provide a discount. For example In Syria, some shops should be closed due to E-commerce and masses became jobless. To recapitulate, Its influence on society, but its numerous advantageous can't be ignored because it plays an effective role.
In previous days, the public can
purchase
things from local
shops
,
but
now
It is irrefutable that an undeniable revert recently in all over the world. Minimal high street
shops
are closed
. According to my perspective, it happened due to E-commerce business, although it has mammoth effects,
but
there are
some
multifarious advantageous they
are outweighed
by the drawbacks.

First
and foremost Since user can
purchase
any necessity items
very
easily
without going to
anywhere
by using online. It has countless benefits to
those humankind
, which couldn't travel to market due busiest life, although it has
very
cheap
, convenient and
also
offer
some
discount, to customers
some
time quality of items should be not effective.
So
online technique has a bigger picture in modernization era.

Pursing this
further
with an illustration that recently
purchased
some
books on Amazon which are not available in the market
shops
,
but
through online it has dispatched within two days if any damage have found out they can
also
provide returnable facilities.

Mostly
to
start
up business required a plethora of money, land and staff etc.
So that
people
give importance to browsing.

Even though
no doubt it had a remarkable impact to retail
shops
and masses
so


Unemployment, face to face communication and physical activity
also
degrade.
Because
shopping malls are the corner where families and friends
get
together. By using
shops
, user can
purchase
items
accordingly
to their satisfaction and needs,
but
shop
retailer can't provide a discount.
For example
In Syria,
some
shops
should
be closed
due to E-commerce and masses became jobless.

To recapitulate, Its influence on society,
but
its numerous advantageous can't be
ignored
because
it plays an effective role.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Many high street shops have gone out of business in recent years. Why do you think this has happened? Is it a positive or negative development? v. 4

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
280 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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