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Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.31

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. v. 31
The authority has been certainly trying to improvise the nation in various sectors. However, some governs are only giving focus on the economy grows as people standard of living will improve, while others give attention to the growth in the agriculture, education ultimately helps in the economic growth. The essay will discuss my stance with arguments in below paragraphs. To begin with, the foremost reason is that money would be considered as a key parameter to buy necessary products. That’s why the government who has good funds available can get the respect from another nation. Even they always get the priorities between many nations. Moreover, people in that nation can live their life fearlessly as no one will think to do a criminal attack on them. For example, America, would be considered as a wealthy nation, as no one will try to spoil the relation with them, even no country would think to start the war with them. On the other hand, there are few regimes who are focusing on the various sectors for their growth. One of the crucial parameters is the agriculture, this is the basic need of everyone. They will use this for their food and earn money by exporting it to another nation. Furthermore, providing the best education can also give an opportunity to an individual’s growth. Having professional skills would help to raise the economy of the nation. For instance, America, can raise their economy by exposing other sector such as agriculture, education. In conclusion, by having money the government can give secure life to their citizen, even to earn that they should start to improvise a various part. As per my opinion, the economic growth and other sector growth are equally important.
The authority has been
certainly
trying to improvise the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
in various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
governs are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
giving focus on the economy grows as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
standard of living will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
, while others give attention to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
in the agriculture, education
ultimately
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in the economic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
. The essay will discuss my stance with arguments in below paragraphs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the foremost reason is that money would
be considered
as a key parameter to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
necessary products. That’s why the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
who has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
funds available can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the respect from another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
. Even they always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the priorities between
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
their life
fearlessly
as no one will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
to do a criminal attack on them.
For example
, America, would
be considered
as a wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
, as no one will try to spoil the relation with them, even no country would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
the war with them.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, there are few regimes who are focusing on the various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
. One of the crucial parameters is the agriculture, this is the basic need of everyone. They will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
this for their food and earn money by exporting it to another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
.
Furthermore
, providing the best education can
also
give an opportunity to an individual’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
. Having professional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to raise the economy of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
.
For instance
, America, can raise their economy by exposing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
such as agriculture, education.

In conclusion
, by having money the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can give secure life to their citizen, even to earn that they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to improvise a various part. As per my opinion, the economic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
are
equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
Chinese Proverb

IELTS essay Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. v. 31

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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