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The mass media, including television, radio and newspapers, have great influence in shaping people's ideas. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.3

The mass media, including television, radio and newspapers, have great influence in shaping people's ideas. v. 3
Several means of communication, such as television and the papers, are believed to impact people’s perspectives about the world. Personally, I completely agree with this view. It is true that people have a tendency to believe in what they see and hear, and mass media are what they encounter on a daily basis. To a certain extent, people entrust these outlets for learning about what is happening around them given the fact that all news being reported have to go through intense scrutiny and rigorous editing process. Therefore, as the observer and reporter of the truth, mass media has earned people trust and, as a result, shaped the way people perceive all day-to-day matters. For instance, the ubiquitous presence of bad news has created a moody and gloomy atmosphere amongst readers, some of whom are left with a pessimistic outlook onto the world. On the other hand, people’s points of view about certain subjects are greatly altered by what they are presented either on TV or in the newspaper. In other words, authors’ bias and prejudice being expressed in the articles have an enormous impact on people’s opinions. For example, a change in voting decision or favoured political party can occur after once a person finishes a piece of news about his or her favourite politician’s opponents, or a desire vegetarianism could be triggered by an article written by an avid eco-warrior or an animal fighter. In conclusion, mass media has an influence on a person’s attitudes and behaviours about life both for better and for worse. Whatever the impact, these platforms of communication have been doing a great job in informing and educating people about the world in which they are living.
Several means of communication, such as television and the papers,
are believed
to impact
people’s
perspectives about
the world.
Personally
, I completely
agree
with this view.

It is true that
people
have a tendency to believe in what they
see
and hear, and mass media are what they encounter on a daily basis. To a certain extent,
people
entrust these outlets for learning about what is happening around them
given
the fact that all news
being reported
have to
go through intense scrutiny and rigorous editing process.
Therefore
, as the observer and reporter of the truth, mass media has earned
people
trust and,
as a result
, shaped the way
people
perceive all day-to-day matters.
For instance
, the ubiquitous presence of
bad
news has created a moody and gloomy atmosphere amongst readers,
some
of whom are
left
with a pessimistic outlook onto the world.

On the other hand
,
people’s
points of view about certain subjects are
greatly
altered by what they
are presented
either on TV or in the newspaper.
In other words
, authors’ bias and prejudice
being expressed
in the articles have an enormous impact on
people’s
opinions.
For example
, a
change
in voting decision or
favoured
political party can occur after once a person finishes a piece of news about
his or her
favourite
politician’s opponents, or a desire vegetarianism could
be triggered
by an article written by an avid
eco-warrior
or an animal fighter.

In conclusion
, mass media has an influence on a person’s attitudes and
behaviours
about life both for better and for worse. Whatever the impact, these platforms of communication have been doing a great job in informing and educating
people
about the world in which they are living.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay The mass media, including television, radio and newspapers, have great influence in shaping people's ideas. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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