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Many employees may work at home with the modern technology. some people claim that it can benefit only the workers, not the employers. Do you agree or disagree? v.3

Many employees may work at home with the modern technology. some people claim that it can benefit only the workers, not the employers. v. 3
Telecommuting plays an indispensable role in people' s life. Some people may work on the internet at home. Whilst, other experienced people believe that it can only be crucial for the workers instead of the company owner. this essay will explain this certainly with a rational approach that needs to have opted. There are innumerable advantages of working at home. Firstly, even if the employees do work on modern technology, Metaphor computers, laptops, and even mobile phones, then it may help to earn more income with which they can fulfill their basic need. Secondly, by working at home, workers also spend their leisure time with their family members as well as they know about what is happening at their home. For instance, due to overpopulation, there are less number of vacancies in several organizations, if the workers do the job at home with modern technology, this may become real for their life and the countries. Lastly, by doing work on communicating devices, people can not need to travel from one place to another by any automobile, as a result the environment issues would also decrease along with the majority of people can work with efficiency and effectiveness in their life. On the other side, it would be also beneficial for employers because as the workers do work on modern equipment at home, then company manager can easily recruit other ideal employees which is very pragmatic for the organization. Additionally, if the people are uneducated, they may easily work on the internet owing to there are different things which they can start learning from it and it can be essential for the employers to promote more workers in a company. Therefore, the productivity and profitability level would escalate, if superior quality work has been done by both the workers and managers. A recent statistics revealed that though the employees start a job at home on computers, it may help an employer to take less burden in their life. There are a few disadvantages to doing work at home. if a worker does the job on the internet, then they can also suffer from health issues which are harmful for their life as well as the production level of each firm also decreases because many people do work by telecommuting. To sum up, although it is a decent way to work at home, as employees can easily devote their spare time with their parents and employer feel relax and comfortable, yet it seems that they should be concerned about its demerits.
Telecommuting plays an indispensable role in
Possible spelling mistake found.
people&
#039; s life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
on the internet at home. Whilst, other experienced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be crucial for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
instead
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
owner.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
this
essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
this
certainly
with a rational approach that needs to have opted.

There are innumerable advantages of working at home.
Firstly
, even if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
on modern technology, Metaphor computers, laptops, and even mobile phones, then it may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to earn more income with which they can fulfill their basic need.
Secondly
, by working at home,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
also
spend their leisure time with their family members
as well
as they know about what is happening at their home.
For instance
, due to overpopulation, there are less number of vacancies in several organizations, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
do the job at home with modern technology, this may become real for their life and the countries.
Lastly
, by doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
on communicating devices,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can not need to travel from one place to another by any automobile,
as a result
the environment issues would
also
decrease along with the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
with efficiency and effectiveness in their life.

On the other side, it would be
also
beneficial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
on modern equipment at home, then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
manager can
easily
recruit other ideal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
pragmatic for the organization.
Additionally
, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are uneducated
, they may
easily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
on the internet owing to there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
things which they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
learning from it and it can be essential for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employers
to promote more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.
Therefore
, the productivity and profitability level would escalate, if superior quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
has
been done
by both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
and managers. A recent statistics revealed that though the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a job at home on computers, it may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employer
to take less burden in their life.

There are a few disadvantages to doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
at home.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
if
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worker
does the job on the internet, then they can
also
suffer from health issues which are harmful for their life
as well
as the production level of each firm
also
decreases
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
by telecommuting.

To sum up, although it is a decent way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
at home, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
can
easily
devote their spare time with their parents and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employer
feel relax and comfortable,
yet
it seems that they should
be concerned
about its demerits.
16Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
32Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
The man who does not know other languages, unless he is a man of genius, necessarily has deficiencies in his ideas.
Victor Hugo

IELTS essay Many employees may work at home with the modern technology. some people claim that it can benefit only the workers, not the employers. v. 3

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
419 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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